Classic Review - Batman: Arkham Asylum [2009]

As much as I loved Insomniac's Marvel's Spider-Man Remastered earlier in the year, it reminded me that I hadn't played much super-hero video games at all. There had never been much overlap between them and game genres like RPGs or FPS so that did have a lot to do with it. Now as I embrace the actions-adventure genre more and more with the likes of Assassin's Creed, Tomb Raider, Star Wars Jedi: Fallen Order and Sony's recent PC ports I felt it was time to check out something that's often lauded as among the better examples of a super-hero game, this of course is the Batman: Arkham series.

Batman: Arkham Asylum is the first in a trilogy of Rocksteady Studios Batman: Arkham games. It was followed by Batman: Arkham City and Batman: Akham Knight (Batman: Arkham Origins was developed by WB in house and is a prequel game to fill the gap in development time between Arkham City and Arkham Knight). While I had read about the games over the years, all I really knew was that you are Batman and you're up against his popular rogue's gallery of villains; but not directly associated to any comic-book, TV or film version of the caped crusader, much like Spider-Man Remastered.

As Batman (the late Kevin Conroy) you deliver The Joker (Mark Hamill) to Arkham Asylum but soon realise that it was Joker's plan to come to the titular asylum, stage a takeover of the island and turn everyone in Gotham into his personal Bane-venom-powered army! Naturally Batman has to investigate the Joker's plan and subsequently thwart it by taking down dozens of inmates and some of the other more infamous Batman villains Joker has placed in his path.

Batman: Arkham Asylum is an action adventure game and I can really only compare it to Spider-Man Remastered in so far as, like Spider-Man it's one of the only games I've ever played where you don't kill anyone; as this would of course be contrary to the character. Arkham Asylum isn't just a fighting game with a Batman skin on the characters and environment, the gameplay here immerses you as Batman and fighting is just one of the tools employed to get from A to B and complete your objectives. It's possible to bypass some of the combat and evade and sneak past your foes, but that didn't strike me as fun in this setting - everyone must be brought to justice and I subdued everyone I saw - that's "my" Batman.

Combat did take a little while to learn, fighting, blocking, jumping, stunning, evading and using powerful 'takedowns' were not easy to master but once you get the hang of each move they game becomes effortless and you can enjoy the more cinematic experience of Batman breaking the bones of the nameless denizens of the asylum. The enemy types were not too varied and some needed specific approaches such as stunning knife wielders or using the batarang to hit and evade brutes at the last second. Combat became furious if you had multiple enemy types in the same 'arena' and had to employ multiple tactics one after the other, but that was when the game was at it's most exciting.

What wasn't exciting was some of the 'boss' fights. These included Scarecrow's nightmare sequences or a fight against Poison Ivy who was inside a giant plant! The perspective of the game changed from the 3rd person over the shoulder camera to a view of the platform or 'arena' and your movement no longer followed the camera - forward was 'left' for example. It took one out of the game and it was difficult to navigate, let alone fight and evade when your controls no longer did what you expected them to. I got through them eventually but they took longer than I would have liked and didn't appreciated the control and perspective forced upon you.

Batman's most famous accessory is his utility belt with an array of gadgets. You start out with Batarangs and a zip line as standard but as the game progresses you fill the belt with an array of additional gadgets that assist in your progress such as the Bat Claw which can move obstacles or remove AC vent covers before crawling about in them (you do a lot of that) and a gun that squirts a plastic explosive onto a weak surface then manually detonate it to reveal a passage or a secret. Batman's keen senses manifest as "detective mode" where he can see points of interest highlighted in his vision and usually point to something that can be manipulated in the environment to use to your advantage. This can also be use in combat where you can see the bones of your enemies.

I said I would try out the tutorial level/sequence of this now 'old' game to see if it was going to be necessary to add in a new fan made enhanced textures pack. But I was met with vibrant well-modelled characters and atmospheric surroundings. To be honest while obviously not 2020s standards, graphically it was far greater than I would have expected from a 14 year old game. I decided against any texture upgrading and left everything as the developers intended for a change.

Final Verdict: Batman: Arkham Asylum was well worth a visit even if a little late, but it's combat was fluid, gadgets were exciting and your progress as a detective was meaningful as you progressed through a pretty straightforward Batman story. Annoying boss fight mechanics kept it from being perfect but I'm certainly looking forward to trying out it's sequels in due course.

Technicals: 15.5 hours through Steam. 3440x1440 @ 62FPS (game limit) on Nvidia 4070Ti under Windows 11

Bugs: None

Availability: Batman: Arkham Asylum Game of the Year Edition is available on Steam or GOG for €19.99. Review copy purchased in Feb 2019 in a bundle with Arkham City and Arkham Knight for €9.99.

Batman: Arkham series:

• Batman: Arkham Asylum [2009]
• Batman: Arkham City [2011]
• Batman: Arkham Origins [2013]
• Batman: Arkham Origins Blackgate [2013]
• Batman: Arkham Knight [2015]
• Batman: Arkham VR [2016]
• Suicide Squad: Kill the Justice League [2024?]

Remembering the late Adam West

Long after the much too dated Batman serials of the 1940's were forgotten, Lorenzo Semple, Jr., William Dozier and Howie Horwitz developed an action-comedy version of the caped crusader to Television screens and cast the great Adam West as Batman/Bruce Wayne. 

West's Batman was a camp, dancing and delivered cornier one-liners than Schwarzenegger or Caruso ever would, but there ware many things that remained true to the Bat-mythos such as his defining detective skills sadly neglected by later incarnations by comparison. The show was a product of its time and while it can't hold up for viewing today, our memories of it while younger are fond and that's a legacy that Adam West, who passed way on Friday should be very proud of.

West had many small roles outside of Batman, but he accepted that the character had typecast him, however he embraced it rather than being embittered and accepted his status as a pop-culture icon in the 1990's and beyond. West understood and embraced how camp and dated this take on the character looked in later years and seemed to relish in every parody and tongue in cheek reference throughout his career, but never derided it. His list of voice credits as an animated Batman is extensive and he also played The Grey Ghost on Batman: The Animated Series as well as voicing the characters of Thomas Wayne and the mayor of Gotham in other series. He also voiced a parody version of himself as the mayor of Quahog on Family Guy for the past 17 years.

West defined Batman for a generation. While many of those born in the mid-late '80's will only define Micheal Keaton, Kevin Conroy or Christian Bale as the true Batman, for those born slightly earlier it has been and will always be Adam West.

2014 - The Year in Review

We say goodbye to 2014, the 70th Anniversary of D-Day and 75th for Batman, a year of Ebola, ISIS, The Ukraine, Frozen, Ferguson Missouri and where Colbert "won" Television.

Where the Winter Olympics in Sochi, Germany won the World Cup and Luis Suárez was hungry. 

When Boko Harem were prompted to Bring Back Our Girls. Crimea was annexed by Russia. Israel and Palestine fought again and the Syria crisis worsened. 

A year of the Ice-Bucket Challenge, the Pistorious verdict, Irish Water charges, when Scotland is united yet divided, MH370 is lost, MH17 is shot down and QZ8501 crashed.

Kim Kardashian's huge oiled ass didn't break the Internet, but we landed something on a fucking comet [which you can even listen to] - there is hope! 

It is time to remember those we have left behind in 2014...

General Carl E. Mundy Jr, former USMC Commandant, former Taoiseach Albert Reynolds, outspoken Northern Irish Unionist politician Ian Paisley, Shirley Temple the child actress who would grow up to be come a U.S. ambassador, Ralph H. Baer engineer, inventor and pioneer of video gaming, author Maya Angelou, artist H. R. Giger, announcer and movie trailer voiceover artist Hal Douglas, TV producer Glen A. Larson, actors Eli Wallach, Mickey Rooney, Philip Seymour Hoffman, James Garner, Bob Hoskins and Lauren Bacall. Comedians Joan Rivers, Harold Ramis, Rik Mayall and Robin Williams. They changed the world and our lives.

Elaine Stritch and Donald Sinden both starred in the British ITV comedy series Two's Company from 1975-1979, both legends passed away in 2014 only 8 weeks apart

We also lost the following people from the world of entertainment:

Elaine Stritch, 89, American award-winning actress (30 Rock, Two's Company)
Sir Donald Alfred Sinden CBE FRSA, 90, English actor (The Day of the Jackal, Two's Company) Roger Lloyd-Pack, 69, English actor (Trigger in Only Fools and Horses)

Hal Sutherland, 84, American animator (Star Trek: The Animated Series), co-founder of Filmation

Sarah Marshall, 80, British actress (Janet Wallace Star Trek: TOS, "The Deadly Years")

John Cacavas, 83, American television score composer (Kojak, Hawaii 5-O, The Bionic Woman, Buck Rogers in the 25th Century)

Bernard Stanley "Acker" Bilk MBE, 85, English clarinetist ("Stranger on the Shore")

Campbell Lane, 78, Canadian actor (Baron Wolfgang von Strucker in Nick Fury: Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D.)

Richard Bull, 89, American actor (Mr. Oleson in Little House on the Prairie, The Doctor in Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea)

Ralph Waite, 85, American marine and actor (The Waltons, NCIS)

Cliff Bole, 76, American television director (MacGyver, T.J. Hooker, Star Trek: The Next Generation)

Christopher Malcolm, 67, Scottish actor (The Empire Strikes Back, Highlander)

Jimmy Murakami, 80, American animator and film director (The Snowman), co-founder of Murakami-Wolf Films

Malcolm Tierney, 75, British actor (Lieutenant Childsen in Star Wars, Braveheart)

Aaron Allston, 53, American game designer (Dungeons & Dragons) and sci-fi author (X-Wing)

James Rebhorn, 65, American actor (Independence Day, Homeland)

David A. Trampier, 59, American fantasy gaming artist (Dungeons & Dragons)

Arthur Smith, 93, American musician and songwriter ("Duelling Banjos" from Deliverance)

Efrem Zimbalist, Jr., 95, American actor (Alfred in Batman: The Animated Series and related shows/video games)

Terry Richards, 81, British actor and stuntman (Arabian Swordsman in Raiders of the Lost Ark, Star Wars, James Bond movies)

Casey Kasem, 82, American radio jockey (American Top 40) and voice actor (Shaggy in Scooby-Doo)

James Shigeta, 85, American actor (Takagi in Die Hard)

Patsy Byrne, 80, English actress (Nursie in Blackadder II)

Bob Hastings, 89, American actor (Commissioner Gordon in Batman: The Animated Series and related shows/video games)

Joe Viskocil, 61, American visual effects artist (Independence Day, Star Wars) Oscar winner (1997)

Cassandra Lynn Hensley, 34, American model (Playboy Miss February 2006)

Arlene Martel, 78, American actress (T'Pring in Star Trek: TOS "Amok Time")

Stephen Lee, 58, American actor (The Negotiator, Chorgan in Star Trek: The Next Generation "The Vengeance Factor")

Brian G. Hutton, 79, American actor and director (Kelly's Heroes, Where Eagles Dare)

The Rt Hon. The Lord Attenborough [Richard Samuel Attenborough], CBE, 90, English award-winning actor, producer and director (Gandhi, The Great Escape, Jurassic Park)

Buster Jones, 71, American voice actor (Blaster in The Transformers, Winston in The Real Ghostbusters and Lothar in Defenders of the Earth)

Polly Bergen, 84, American singer and actress (Rhoda Henry in The Winds of War and War and Remembrance) Emmy Award winner (1958)

Geoffrey Holder, 84, Trinidadian actor (Baron Samedi in Live and Let Die)

Jan Hooks, 57, American comedienne and actress (Saturday Night Live, Batman Returns, 30 Rock)

Carol Ann Susi, 62, American actress (Mrs. Wolowitz in The Big Bang Theory)

Richard Kiel, 74, American actor (Jaws in the James Bond movies)

Christine Cavanaugh, 51, American voice actress (The Critic)

John Robert "Joe" Cocker, OBE ("With a little help from my Friends", "Up Where We Belong")

Maximilian Schell, 83, Austrian-Swiss Oscar-winning actor (A Bridge Too Far, Cross of Iron)

Elizabeth Peña, 55, American actress (The Incredibles, Modern Family)

Mike Nichols, 83, German-born American director (Catch-22), Oscar winner (1968)

Don Pardo, 96, American radio and television announcer (Saturday Night Live)

Menahem Golan, 85, Israeli director and producer (Operation Thunderbolt, The Delta Force, Masters of the Universe), founder of Golan-Globus and the Cannon Group

Edward Herrmann, 71, American actor (Nixon, The Lost Boys, The Aviator)

The Ultimate Warrior, 54, American Hall of Fame professional wrestler (WWE)

Warren Clarke, 67, British actor (Firefox, Top Secret!)

Dennis Lipscomb, 72, American actor (Under Siege, Wiseguy, In the Heat of the Night)

Jimi Jamison, 63, American musician (Baywatch theme, Survivor "Burning Heart")

Lee Marshall, 64, American radio personality, professional wrestling announcer and voice actor (Tony The Tiger)

we appreciate the legacy of their talents and creativity.

Jackie Healy-Rae, charismatic former Fianna Fáil politician who left the party to become an Independent TD and founded a political dynasty.

We also acknowledge those who died in 2014 who devoted much of their lives to military, scientific, industrial or public service:

Vicente T. Blaz, 85, American USMC general and politician, delegate to the U.S. House of Representatives from Guam (1985–1993)

Captain John J. McGinty III, 73, American Marine Corps officer, recipient of the Medal of Honor

Major-General Patrick Guy Brooking CB CMG MBE DL, 76, former Commandant of the British Sector in Berlin [1985]

John Carty, 63, Irish politician, FF TD for Mayo (2002–2007), Senator (2007–2011)

Captain Dale Gardner, 65, American naval officer and astronaut (STS-8, STS-51-A)

Valeri Kubasov, 79, Russian engineer and cosmonaut (Soyuz 6, Apollo-Soyuz Test Project/Soyuz 19, Soyuz 36)

Lieutenant Walter D. Ehlers, 92, American World War II soldier, recipient of the Medal of Honor

Major Kurt Chew-Een Lee, 88, American military officer, first Asian-American officer in the Marine Corps, recipient of the Navy Cross

Staff Sergeant William Guarnere, 90, American World War II non-commissioned officer and author, key figure in Band of Brothers

Leutnant Hermann Schleinhege, 98, German Luftwaffe ace during World War II [97 aerial victories]

Colonel Ola L. Mize, 82, American army officer, Korean War recipient of the Medal of Honor

James R. Schlesinger, 85, American government official, Director of the CIA (1973), Secretary of Defense (1973–1975), Secretary of Energy (1977–1979)

Rear Admiral Jeremiah Denton, 89, American politician and naval officer, Senator from Alabama (1981–1987), recipient of the Navy Cross

Colonel James H. Kasler, 87, American Air Force officer, three-time recipient of the Air Force Cross

General of the Army Vladimir Popovkin, 56, Russian military officer, General Director of the Russian Federal Space Agency (2011–2013)

Avraham Shalom, 86, Austrian-born Israeli security official, Director of the Shin Bet (1980–1986), commander in the capture of Adolf Eichmann and the Bus 300 affair

PFC Chuck Tatum, 87, American WWII Marine, Iwo Jima combatant, provided source material for The Pacific

Denis Lyons, 78, Irish politician, FF TD for Cork North Central (1981–1992)

Colonel Henry Hartsfield, 80, American air force officer, NASA astronaut and test pilot (Columbia), commander for Discovery and Challenger missions

Major Theodore Van Kirk, 93, American military officer, navigator and last surviving crew member on the Enola Gay

Sergeant Major Jon R. Cavaiani, 70, American NCO and prisoner of war, Army Special Forces, recipient of the Medal of Honor

Yitzhak Hofi, 87, Israeli general, Director of Mossad (1974–1982)

Colonel Anatoly Berezovoy, 72, Soviet cosmonaut (Soyuz T-5)

Lieutenant General Lincoln D. Faurer, 86, American air force officer, Director of the National Security Agency (1981–1985)

Flight Lieutenant Bill Green, 97, English Battle of Britain RAF fighter pilot

General Ramsey Muir Withers, CMM, CD, 84, Canadian army officer, Chief of the Defence Staff (1980–1983)

Jackie Healy-Rae, 83, Irish politician, fmr FF, IND TD for Kerry South (1997–2011)

Ariel Sharon, 85, Israeli politician and general, Minister of Defense (1981–1983), Prime Minister (2001–2006)

Karl Albrecht, 94, German billionaire grocery executive, co-founder of Aldi

Brian Farrell, 85, British-born Irish broadcaster and journalist

we thank them for their service to their respective fields.

I must also mention the passing of Angalifu, a Sudanese-born American rhinoceros, and was one of two remaining male northern white rhinoceros, Julia O’Donnell, “Ireland’s most famous mammy” mother of singer Daniel O’Donnell who died at 94 and O Sang-hon, a 50 year old North Korean deputy security minister in the Ministry of Public Security, who was bizarrely executed by flamethrower in the political purge. May they rest in peace.

And now we look forward to

2015

Happy New Year

81 million views and counting...

Can the "B-Team" superheroes step forward?

DC Comics Superman and Marvel's Wolverine returned to the silver screen this summer and I can categorically say they were both substantially better then their previous respective outings. However when you remember that both Brian Singer's Superman Returns and Gavin Hood's X-Men Origins: Wolverine are considered to be next to the worst movies they appeared in [Superman IV and X-Men: The Last Stand taking those distinctions] that's not saying a lot.

Man of Steel

Man of Steel was certainly a different take on the 75 year old American cultural icon once immortalised by Christopher Reeve on screen. Zack 300 Snyder took the reigns to present a more modern-era Superman/Clark Kent [Henry Cavill] who must pursue his destiny as protector of the planet from the evil General Zod [Michael Shannon].

Interestingly, while Snyder gives the character an origin story once again, he does not dwell to much on the characters infancy favouring a considerable look at life on Krypton before and of course during it's destruction. Russell Crowe delivers an outstanding performance as Jor-El during this period of the movie and you regret that it can't be longer. Diane Lane and Kevin Costner step into the parental roles as the Kents with Costner himself shining as the father figure who instilled wisdom into a young Clark.

Cavill himself is "competent" as the man himself, easily surpassing a forgettable Brandon Routh but has nowhere near the charm Christopher Reeve displayed on screen. A complete lack of story development between him and the criminally underused Amy Adams as Lois Lane as well as their relationship being devoid of chemistry is one of the movies major failings.

Despite being a special effects spectacle and sporting the unique sounds of maestro Hans Zimmer the movie fails to reach orbital heights it's title character is able to. The beginning is so utterly superior to the rest of the movie, you want it to be longer and the finale is so completely dragged out and arse-numbingly overlong that it can only delight those with a worryingly short attention span. I'm all for explosions and collateral damage and supermen being through through buildings, but after it happens over a dozen times in the one sequence you want to shout "get on with it!"

There will be a sequel which has been revealed to feature Batman?! Hopefully they've got all the near-pointless destruction out of their system now and well see some character development or at least some semblance of a proper story in the next Man of Steel.

Colonel Creedon Rating: ***1/2

The Wolverine

The Wolverine is a loose adaptation of the mutant's first solo outing by Chris Claremont and Frank Miller from 1982 in which Logan travels to Japan and has a grand adventure featuring The Silver Samurai, lots of Ninjas, Yukio the ronin and of course Mariko his true love.

The Wolverine, like the majority of comic-book movies, does not stick too rigidly to it’s source material. Claremont’s tale provided a framework for Mark Bomback and Scott Frank to craft a screenplay[something that was sorely lacking in the character’s previous solo instalment] and through DP Ross Emery, director James Mangold recreated some of Frank Millar's visceral visuals. If you appreciate a dose of Japanese culture, martial arts, Ninja/Samurai and all that lark in your modern popular culture then you’ll appreciate the type of action on offer here, and I’m confident the movie will go down well in Asian markets.

Hugh Jackman is given a great opportunity to flesh out the character of Logan and I believe the audience is drawn to truly empathise and relate with the character like never before. Given that he’s a roughly 130 year old self-healing mutant that can eject razor sharp claws from his hands, that’s not an inconsiderable writing/acting feat and kudos to all involved. It has escaped previous movies to adequately portray his internal battle as well as his external ones and this is the closest I've seen so far.

Jackman is joined on screen by Famke Janssen reprising her role as the late Jean Grey appearing in a series of haunting dreams and seems adamant that an increasingly depressed Logan join her in death as soon as possible - a feat made difficult due to his longevity and healing factor. Logan is intrigued by the offer made to him by Yashida whose life he saved during WWII, who through medical science may be able to allow Logan to age and die. Naturally, things in such movies are never so simple but if they weren’t then it wouldn’t be much of a movie.

I was certainly happier at how faithful Fox/Marvel were to the character, far more than the previous instalment and sadly a visibly greater effort that than WB/DC achieved with their own hero above.

Colonel Creedon Rating: ****1/2

RIP Michael Ansara 1922-2013

Michael George Ansara, a Syrian-born American stage, screen, and voice actor best known for his portrayal of Commander Kang on three different Star Trek series has passed. He was 91.

Ansara began acting in the 1950's and appeared in westerns - including The Lone Ranger [1956] - on both the big screen and small before starring in his own TV show Law of the Plainsman playing Native American U.S. Marshal Sam Buckhart, a spin off character from The Rifleman.

Ansara appeared in the biblical movies The Ten Commandments and The Greatest Story Ever Told as well as the 1953 adaptation of Shakespeare's Julius Caesar but he had a more distinguished career on TV appearing in many Television series in production throughout his career. These included The Untouchables, The Fugitive, Hawaii Five-0, The Streets of San Fransisco, Shaft, Mission: Impossible, The Rockford Files, Kojak, CHiPs, The Fall Guy, Mike Hammer and Murder, She Wrote.

Despite a career forged in the dust of westerns, it will be through the genre of science fiction that Ansara's name will be remembered. In 1961 he played scientist Miguel Alvarez in Irwin Allen's groundbreaking movie Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea and followed the role by appearing in the later spin-off series. His career in sci-fi continued with an appearances on Lost in Space, The Time Tunnel and as Killer Kane in Buck Rogers in the 25th Century. He also played the title role in the acclaimed The Outer Limits original series episode "Soldier", written by Harlan Ellison and later in his career he portrayed the Technomage Elric in an episode of Babylon 5.

In 1968 Ansara took on the mantle of arguably his most memorable character, the Klingon Commander Kang in the 3rd season Star Trek episode "Day of the Dove". To the delight of fans, Ansara reprised his character some 25 years later in "Blood Oath", an episode of Star Trek: Deep Space Nine and even later in "Flashback" an episode of Star Trek: Voyager making him one of only seven actors to play the same character on three different Star Trek series. Ansara also appeared [sans Klingon makeup] as Jeyal, Lwaxana Troi's husband on the Deep Space Nine episode, "The Muse".

Ansara also lent his voice to various animated productions including Spider-Man and his Amazing Friends and Thundarr The Barbarian. He later portrayed General Warhawk in the Rambo animated series but it was for his work on various incarnations of Batman's animated adventures that his voice work will be most regarded. In 1992 Ansara began voicing Victor Fries/Mr. Freeze on the Batman animated series, later in the 1997 The New Batman Adventures, Batman Beyond in 1999 and the video game Batman: Vengeance. Ansara bestowed a level of humanity to the villain, allowing the audience to empathise with Fries' plight which no other medium even attempted.

Ansara married actress Barbara Eden in 1958 and appeared with her in an episode of I Dream of Jeanie. He died following a long illness at his home in Calabasas, California and is survived by Beverly, his third wife for 36 years.

The Dark Knight has Risen

 

Batman, The Dark Knight of Gotham is here for this third and final outing under the direction of Christopher Nolan. The wait was long, punctuated by the usually glossy hype that surrounds a movie of this calibre. With the first two instalments of Nolan’s Batman trilogy being heralded as being among the greatest movies of all time, the pressure was certainly on the British director to deliver a fitting end to such an amazing saga, a trifecta of intellectual depth, superb action and astounding technical achievement. Thankfully Nolan delivered all, in spades.

Uniquely, The Dark Knight Rises is as much a sequel to Batman Begins as it is to The Dark Knight before it with a multitude of threads in this intricate celluloid tapestry being woven together in one spectacular whole. Here Bruce Wayne must now face his mortality in a way that he hadn’t faced it before and must regain the physical and spiritual connection with Gotham City he possessed before his fall from grace. This fall of course itself a lie borne by his greatest ally Jim Gordon, but not for much longer. Now a haggard and limping social recluse, Wayne has all but forgotten the Batman as Gotham has achieved an almost Utopian level of lawfulness. However a new threat seeks to raise an army to wrest control of the city to a truly nefarious end. The Dark Knight Rises explores many themes but chief among them is that “anyone can be Batman” something that has been cemented throughout the trilogy.

Christian Bale’s performance is as good as he’s been giving throughout the series which sadly means he hasn’t evolved a great deal himself. This is a pity as The Fighter proved what an incredible actor he can be. Bale was outdone once again by Gary Oldman who portrayed a much older Gordon now wrestling with his conscience at the terrible burden of lies he bore. Joseph Gordon Levitt shone as Blake, a streetwise cop whom Gordon makes a detective and to whom he transfers much of the footwork he’s unable to do himself. Anne Hathaway, initially regarded as a strange choice for Catwoman, without even so much as a purr made us all but forget Michelle Pfeiffer’s shiny PVC catsuit from Batman Returns. In fact she nailed it so delectably perfectly that there have been numerous calls for her to take her character into her own movie [undoubtedly to fare better than Halle Berry’s misguided crime against film]. Tom Hardy bulked up for his role as the imposing Bane, the menacing anarchist. Despite sometimes being somewhat difficult to understand he lent a powerful performance to the legendary “Knightfall” saga Batman villain, “the man who broke the bat”.

Supporting them, another Inception alumni, Marion Collitard whom I genuinely dislike as an actress, yet wasn’t too put off from her admittedly ‘above standard’ performance here. Matthew Modine, another actor I care quite little for portrays Foley, Gotham’s chief of Detectives and while his character is not one we should be impressed with, I have to say kudos for Modine for a great interpretation. Returning for his final time, Morgan Freeman as Lucius Fox, Batman’s answer to “Q” from James Bond, lending credence to the oft asked “Where does he get those wonderful toys?” and provides The Dark Knight with his most impressive vehicle yet, The Bat. However it was Michael Caine who really stepped it up this time around as Alfred and delivered something no less than Oscar-worthy proving that unlike some of the latest efforts from peers Anthony Hopkins and Ben Kingsley it is Caine that truly deserves to be called a “Sir”.

While sadly due to the London Olympics, I was denied a comfortable chance at witnessing Rises in Imax, but it was easy to spot at which points Nolan chose to switch to the extraordinary format adding to the immersion of the world he created as he did with Inception before it. There was some extraordinary CGI work done for a movie that while fantastical, is fused with the modern reality. The camera glided over Gotham and the scale of the troubled city was clearly established, albeit with some reality bending CGI [those exploded bridges aren’t really that long according to Constance]. 

To aid in the crafting of Gotham and to aid in a cohesion of design quality, Nathan Crowley returned from the previous two movies to lend his production design talents transforming Pittsburgh into a modern and realistic Gotham City. While he had collaborated with the excellent James Newton Howard for the previous instalments, Hans Zimmer was left to his own devices for the final instalment and it shows. Unleashed and solo, Zimmer has a tendency to go off the musical rails and while an excellent score in its own right, it lacks a cohesion that Newton Howard obviously brought to the fore.

It’s often the case in Hollywood where the third movie of a franchise isn’t as good as the others but this movie series has had the benefit of the same production value and creative team for all of them and it shows that there was no creative expense spared for the grand finale of this spectacular saga. If I was to level any criticism at it, I would have to say that it did indeed run a little too long at 165 mins, The Dark Knight had it right at about 150 mins, still epic but that quarter of an hour can make all the difference and there's a few bits that could have been shaved from the middle. It may hold true that when compared with the others in other ways, that Rises is not the best of the three but when you’re talking about movies that are as close in quality as these three Batman movies then it is still a sublime manifestation of an extraordinary creative effort made whole and produced a true genre-defining movie that transcends everything one hoped.

 

Final Verdict: Stay away from this if you don’t like epic movies over 2.5 hours long and want your super-heroes to ever seem real, because this is what this movie actually does.

Colonel Creedon Rating: *****

Deliberately Untitled

Nowadays I try to stay away from commentary on the kinds of atrocities that sick and disturbed individuals commit on groups of unsuspecting innocents such as the tragedy which unfolded in Aurora, Colorado not 48 hours ago.

I'm presuming by now that everyone has seen the usual awful media frenzy that surrounds this type of tragedy and are aware of the events. A young man apparently legally purchased an AR-15 assault rifle, a shotgun and a .40 Cal Glock and hundreds of rounds of ammunition within the last two months. He put on a mask and body armour, called himself "The Joker" and proceeded into a midnight showing of The Dark Knight Rises shooting and killing 12 people and wounding almost 60 others.

Normally I'm glad when the perpetrator turns the gun on themselves or is taken down in a permanent fashion by the police. However in this one instance I'm glad he wasn't because he was able to inform the police that his apartment was booby-trapped, possibly averting the deaths of subsequent investigators. I'm also delighted that Colorado has the death penalty, only unfortunately it's a "humane" kind... something that this bastard did not allow his victims.

My condolences go out to the families of the victims of this senseless tragedy, sentiments echoed by many other influential people. The US Department of Defense released a statement yesterday: "...Our thoughts and prayers are with the victims and the families of those impacted by this event. One sailor was injured and one, known to have been at the theatre that evening, is currently unaccounted for.  Two airmen were injured in the incident.  The Navy and the Air Force are working with the families of these service members to ensure they have the care and attention they need." I've since learned that the unaccounted for sailor was one of the victims, Petty Officer John Larimer, 27. 

Chuck Rozanski, President of Mile High Comics of Denver, Colorado [the outlet from which I have purchased much of my considerable Iron Man collection] also expressed condolences, and was relieved that none of his staff, their families or friends were victims of the incident and considers that his choice of local theatre for his midnight viewing was the right one: "I was at a different movie theater last night with my wife, daughter and her fiancé. Had the shooter chosen to instead make the quick drive from Aurora to Boulder, the horror of last night could have easily been ours to bear..." Rozanski however wants to help those less fortunate: "it is clear by the fact that they were willing to attend a midnight showing of The Dark Knight Rises that they were, at least by some measure, comics fans. That being the case, I think that it is beholden upon all of us in the comics world to pull together to help them in their time of need. For the families of the dead, we want to help with funeral expenses. For the wounded, we want to help with medical bills." and so 10% of all proceeds from the current Mile High Comics sale will be placed in a fund for them.

As you can imagine, director Christopher Nolan was upset and calling the shooting an appalling crime said: "I believe movies are one of the great American art forms and the shared experience of watching a story unfold on screen is an important and joyful pastime. The movie theater is my home, and the idea that someone would violate that innocent and hopeful place in such an unbearably savage way is devastating to me." Oscar winning composer Hans Zimmer said: "I was going to send a note to Chris [Nolan] ... but I didn't have the words. Suddenly, words become meaningless because it's so beyond anything."

I finish with the words of wisdom... nay - a 'call to arms' from long time contributor and friend Bruce Russell: "Everyone, please go to a movie this weekend. Don't let one lunatic impact your life in a negative way. Go see Amazing Spider-Man, The Dark Knight Rises, Madagascar 3, whatever. Do your bit."

The Colonel's Bullets - January 4th 2011

NASA and Science and Entertainment Exchange have drafted a list of the least plausible science fiction movies ever made. Roland Emmerich's nonsensical movie 2012 which depicted the end of [most of] the world, featured ahead of two more apocalyptic movies - The Core and Armageddon.

Donald Yeomans, head of the Near-Earth Asteroid Rendezvous mission, says "It's absurd. The film-makers took advantage of public worries about the so-called end of the world as apparently predicted by the Mayans. The agency is getting so many questions from people terrified that the world is going to end in 2012 that we have had to put up a special website to challenge the myths. We have never had to do this before." NASA and the SEE also compiled a list of the top 10 most realistic sci-fi films, with Gattaca, Jurassic Park even Contact among the most "realistic" sci-fi films.

***

I regret to announce the death of Pete Postlethwaite OBE, one of England's more prolific contemporary actors. Among his numerous roles were Split Second, Alien 3, The Last Of The Mohicans, The Usual Suspects, Dragonheart, Æon Flux and Soloman Kane. He was nominated for an Academy Award for his role as Giuseppe Conlon in In The Name Of The Father. In the past year, while battling cancer he appeared in Clash of the Titans, Inception and The Town.
Steven Spielberg called Postlethwaite "the best actor in the world" after working with him on The Lost World: Jurassic Park, to which Postlethwaite quipped: "I'm sure what Spielberg actually said was, 'The thing about Pete is that he thinks he's the best actor in the world.'" May he rest in peace.

***

According to the Executive Vice-President of IMAX David Keighley; Chris Nolan has had 4 or 5 meetings already with IMAX about The Dark Knight Rises. Bit depth improvements are being worked on so it will look more film like (when they project digitally). For The Dark Knight Rises they are trying to get more than 1,000 shades of color as film has over 4,000 shades of color and there will be a greater portion of The Dark Knight Rises in IMAX than there was in The Dark Knight.

***

Avatar was unsurprisingly the most pirated movie of 2010 with over 16.5m downloads according to Torrentfreak. A remarkable increase of 33% over Star Trek, the most pirated movie of the previous year. 20th Century Fox isn't crying all that much as Avatar grossed almost $2.8Bn at the worldwide box office. Read the full report here.

Sources: WENN / Collider / Hollywood Reporter

The Colonel's Bullets - November 15th 2010

Paramount Pictures

Star Trek 2 has no villain announced yet. Klingons? Khan? but we know it will be characters or a character we already know, now in a "reboot" form. J.J. Still not assigned to direct but movie on track for 29/06/12.

Transformers: Dark of the Moon, the final part of Bay's Transformers trilogy will bookend the tale in a spectacular fashion blowing $250m in gigantic robots and associated explosions. In this new movie, the Autobots and Decepticons become involved in a perilous space race between the U.S. and Russia.

G.I. Joe 2 is in progress, Stephen Sommers will return to direct while Zombieland writers Rhett Reese and Paul Wernick, were hired to write the script.

Paramount will not be releasing The Avengers [May 2012] or Iron Man 3 [May, 2013] as Disney, new owners of Marvel have stepped in and said "We want them now, but we'll still let you release Captain America and Thor". Disney/Marvel have also asked writers to pitch scripts for a potential War Machine movie!

The Dark Knight Rises

is the official title for Nolan's finale to his Batman trilogy and there are currently in excess of a dozen rumours about some 10 different actresses in line for Catwoman or another female villain. While we know there will be no 3D as Nolan hates it, Collider reported it will most likely be shot entirely in IMAX's epic 70mm format.

Roland Emmerich,

who usually tries to destroy the world with ID4, 2012 and The Day After Tomorrow wanted to step away from his over-use of CGI and multi-million dollar insanity to do a "found video" format movie, involving aliens all for about $5m. It's probably not going to happen as Apollo 18, from Wanted director Timur Bekmambetov will also be a "found video" format.

Conan Triumphant

Treacherous rat Jay Leno’s current The Tonight Show hasn't been getting Conan O’Brien’s Tonight Show numbers in the 18-49 demographic much to the upset of NBC, and on Monday night Leno was further kicked in the ratings crotch by the premiere of Conan, O' Brien's new TBS show which garnered more than 300% of big-jaw's share of that important range as that's the one advertisers target.

Well done Coco!

Source AICN/ IGN

The Colonel's Bullets - October 5th 2010

Mission: Impossible IV
Mission Impossible IV is a go with Brad The Incredibles Bird directing Tom Cruise, Ving Rhames and Simon Pegg with Jeremy The Hurt Locker Renner, Josh Lost Holloway and Michael Nyqvist from The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo as Ethan Hunt's nemesis. Expect it Christmas 2011.

Superman/Batman
Warner Bros. have hired Zack 300/Watchmen Snyder - to bring Superman back to the big screen. Christopher The Dark Knight Nolan will produce, presumably after he directs his 3rd Batman movie, which he is now confirmed as doing.

Underworld 4
Kate Beckinsale will reprise her role as Selene in Underworld 4 to begin filming in March, but comic book writer and Babylon 5 creator J. Michael Straczynski has rewritten an original draft by The Shield's John Hlavin. Producers are currently seeking a director for the film, as well as an actress to play the role of Selene's daughter.

Alien prequel
Production has stalled on Ridley Scott's Alien prequel because Scott wants a $250m budget and a hard "R" rating but Fox wants to give him less money and to be able to present it to a younger audience. Let's hope Sir Ridley won't compromise and walk rather than succumb to Fox's nonsense.

Sources: AICN / IGN

The 81st Oscars - through the eyes of The Colonel

I've not watched the Oscars in some time and there was nothing in particular I wanted to see, but I said I'd check out Hugh Jackman's presentation as he seemed like such an odd choice to front the greatest event in Hollywood [I had no idea he had a background in stage musicals and even has a Tony for it - up to now I thought he was Wolverine, Van Helsing and a hacker that can break encryption in seconds while getting blown].

I wasn't disappointed. It seemed like a more intimate setting and there was none of the fake cash splashing visuals that turned previous years presentations into a plasticky [for want of a better word] borefest. I had no idea Jackman could sing and dance like that he seemed very comfortable up on stage with Anne Hathaway in the beginning and Beyoncé in the mid-programme show.

Some of the ceremony's highlights included:

+ Jackman's opening song with fabricated recession-inspired trash representing some of the movies up for awards and ending in his proclamation that he's WOLVERINE!!!! Inspired.

+ Steve Martin and Tina Fey's hilarious presentation of screenwriting awards especially their Scientology gag.

+ Ben Stiller appearing [and remaining in character] as a Ben Stiller who announced he was retiring from being a funnyman to take up cinematography - complete with sunglasses and a big beard, chewing gum akin to the recent appearance of Joaquin Phoenix and making a half-assed attempt at presenting a cinematography award with Natalie Portman. Portman, ever the true actor, managed to go along with this fairly straight-faced for over two minutes before beginning to laugh as Stiller had by then, "wandered off" in the background away from the podium admiring the show set pieces in stoned-like wonder.

+ Jackman's mid-show tribute to the resurgence of the musical with Beyoncé created by Baz Luhrmann [despite there being ABBA parts from that tripe Mama Mia].

+ and finally Queen Letifah's moving rendition of "I'll Be Seeing You" to movie clips of all the recently deceased stars and crew [including Stan Winston] and finishing with Paul Newman.

But it can't all be good. The 81st Oscars were marred by people like Bill Maher who presented the documentry Oscars - as if the category wasn't fuckin' depressing enough already than having that moron on stage for them. Naturally I fast forwarded through him...

- Mama Mia! was mentioned several times in a positive light.

- Ben Kingsley is still being introduced as "Sir Ben Kingsley". Anthony Hopkins stood on the stage beside him and despite their Queen also bestowing the title upon him as well, he doesn't "vehemently insist" on being introduced as "Sir Anthony Hopkins", but "Sir Ben" as he must be called, demands it.

- Sean Penn getting an award. I fuckin' hate Sean Penn, a class-1 wanker and his shoehorning of his misguided political agendas into award speeches. His death can never be too soon.

Now while I was pleased with the actual show, most of the awards themselves were as usual bestowed on some of the most torturous boring crap produced of all time. Who really gives a crap about the story of Benjamin Button, Harvey Milk, some Indian laddie who won a million rupies or a conspiracy within the catholic clergy or whatever Doubt is about [I honestly couldn't even be bothered to find out]. If the answer is you? Then you're on the wrong blog. But if you want so see proper recognition for The Dark Knight along with the likes of Iron Man, Aliens Vs. Predator 2, Rambo, The Incredible Hulk, Taken, Max Payne and other movies far more deserving than the tosh you saw at the 81st Oscars - then tune in here at the weekend for the nominations for the 4th Annual WHOPPER AWARDS!!!

Catwoman should be someone you want to lick out of her leather!

Naturally before the dust has even begun to fall in the wake of The Dark Knight's storm through the international box-office, Warner Brothers have greenlight a second sequel to Batman Begins currently titled The Caped Crusader. As I remarked in the comments to my Definitive Dark Knight Review, I said that I was very worried about a third Batman. And here's why--

The first choice of Christopher Nolan to play Catwoman is... CHER!

Now before you laugh and cry simultaneously- I read this in the Daily Telegraph, hardly something that has the pulse on Hollywood, and although I looked at the date to see if it was April 1st - this news isn't anywhere else originally. AICN and others read what I did so I'm officially designating this as nonsense at this point.

Right: Michelle Pfeiffer as Catwoman, you may need to print this picture out and stare at it instead of looking at parts of The Caped Crusader. Also, I just couldn't bring myself to include a picture of Cher on this blog.

Catwoman should be someone you want to lick out of her leather! While admittedly this wasn't Ertha Kitt in 1967 (shudder), they got it right with Julie Newmar (1966), Michille Pfeiffer (1992) and Halle Berry in 2004.

I mean seriously? Cher?! Maybe as Catwoman's GRANDMOTHER or something!!! Nolan may have redefined the iconic images of The Joker, Scarecrow and Two-Face but making Cher Catwoman would be above insane.

2IGTV Episode 59

In this long-awaited episode we open with a discussion on The Dark Knight and Wanted. Other movies include Star Wars: The Clone Wars, a Red Dawn remake, a Clash of the Titans remake, The Punisher: War Zone, Green Lantern, Top Gun 2 and more.

The state of Television is still dire but we observe the return of Stargate Atlantis, Burn Notice and the debut of Flashpoint. We anticipate the return of Chuck, Gossip Girl (Well Mark does), Heroes and the debut of Knight Rider and the upcoming Virtuality.

We also discuss the non-entity that was E3 and some games from that, GPU technology and wrap up with the announcement of our competition winner. All this and much more.

Get the episode here. and Discuss this episode in our forums.

The Dark Knight - The Definitive Review

I've tried to write this review 5 times over the past 10 days even during my outage. I've failed each time. I can only come to the conclusion that I'm not articulate enough do describe The Dark Knight's magnificence. This is not to be seen as a failure however, my "writers block" should be construed as an indication to you of how great this movie is. I knew it was going to be the best movie of the year. I spent about €200 on a day trip to the colossal BFI IMAX theater in London just to see it.


All I can say was since even before the death of Heath Ledger, the rumblings for this movie were all positive. Everyone who got a glimpse of the effects work, script and workprint previews were left as speechless as I was- or perhaps they knew what a gem it was and didn't reveal anything prematurely. Nevertheless, nothing remotely negative was said about it before and I've not heard anything to that effect afterward. (Well maybe Christian Bale's voice while he was obviously choking in his Batman cowl was a bit to silly and it did look like his lips were being pursed by the opening in the mask - but these are minor quibbles).

Ledger's Joker is the greatest Comic-Book movie villain ever, but not worthy of an Oscar. If an Oscar should be given- it should go to the team responsible for the Harvey Dent/Two Face makeup and CGI FX.

Final Verdict: While Iron Man my have been my most anticipated film of all time and it certainly did not disappoint on any ground, it doesn't even come close to The Dark Knight which I'm forced to declare as the film of the year. As good as Quantum Of Solace is hoped to be, it's unlikely to better it either. See it in IMAX if possible - the aerial shots are amazing.

Colonel Creedon Rating: *****+

2IGTV Episode 55

The Strike is Over!

In this episode: Experience what The Colonel has been doing through during the writers strike and discover his prophecy of President McCain. As an added bonus: hear Mark sing!

Down to business and we have a comprehensive list of shows and information on when they’ll be returning. We have news on some of the latest movie corporation lawsuits and distressing new concerning the beloved pastime of downloading in the UK.

Also hear about National Treasure 2: Book Of Secrets, Rambo, Teeth, Knight Rider, Wizards First Rule and Star Wars: The Clone Wars. We discuss Heath Ledger, Roy Scheider and Jack Nicholson.

It’s all here.

Discuss this episode in our forums.

Obituary: Heath Ledger

Heath Ledger was found dead at a Manhattan apartment this afternoon in what appeared to be a possible drug-related death. The actor was discovered in one of the SoHo apartment's bedrooms at 15:31 p.m. An initial police report also cited by the New York Times said that foul play was not suspected and that pills had been found near Ledger's body.

A native of Australia, Ledger shot to fame as a teen heartthrob in 10 Things I Hate About You before graduating to more adult roles, most notably his Oscar-nominated turn in cowboy fag-fest Brokeback Mountain. Engaged to Dawson's Creek's Michelle Williams, the two had a kid before a split in recently.

I first noticed Ledger in The Patriot where he played Mel Gibson's character's eldest son Gabriel who joins the American forces fighting the British in the Revolutionary War and helps his father fight a guerrilla war after serving time as a British prisoner prisoner. He was later most adequate in a starkly contrasted role as William Thatcher in the slightly ridiculous lighthearted adaptation Geoffrey Chaucer's A Knight's Tale.

However it is only this year that he has completed the movie which he will be now be remembered for all time. In August 2006 I broke the news here that Ledger was to play The Joker in the Batman Begins sequel film The Dark Knight. His progress in the role was reported on 2IGTV in a number of episodes in 2007. It does appear that that he had finished filming on that and the movie is currently set for release this summer so there is no fear for a need for a "Brandon Lee" or worse an "Oliver Reed" substitute situation.

It's a true tragedy that such a promising career has been cut short so early. I'll leave the wild speculation and unsubstantiated theories as to why in the more than capable hands of the bottom-feeding "press".

THE COLONEL SAYS NO TO DRUGS!