In memoriam, 2018

Let us remember those we lost in 2018:

Paul Allen, 65, American businessman and co-founder of Microsoft.

Stanley Anderson, 78, American actor who played the President in both "The Rock" and "Armageddon".

Kofi Annan, 80, Ghanaian diplomat, Secretary-General of the United Nations (1997–2006), Nobel Prize laureate (2001).

Captain Alan LaVern Bean, USN Ret., 86, American naval officer, naval aviator, aeronautical engineer, test pilot, and NASA astronaut. The the fourth person to walk on the Moon.

Ken Berry, 85, American actor, "F Troop".

David Bischoff, 66, American novelist and television writer "Star Trek: The Next Generation" episodes "Tin Man" and "First Contact".

Steven Bochco, 74, 10-time Emmy winning American television producer and writer "Hill Street Blues", "L.A. Law", "NYPD Blue".

Anthony Bourdain, 61, Four time Emmy winning American chef, author and television host

Jim Bowen, 80, English television presenter and comedian, "Bullseye".

Peter Brace, 94, British actor and stuntman, "Raiders of the Lost Ark", "Batman", "Highlander" and Peter Mayhew's stunt double in "Star Wars".

Staff Sgt. Russell Brown, USA Ret., 96, 82nd Airborne Division. Made every combat jump during World War II.

Barbara Bush, 92, American political matriarch, First Lady (1989–1993) and Second Lady (1981–1989).

President George H. W. Bush, 94, American politician, President (1989–1993), Vice President (1981–1989), Director of Central Intelligence (1976–1977).

Montserrat Caballé, 85, Spanish opera singer, "Barcelona" w. Freddie Mercury.

Joseph Campanella, 93, American actor "Mannix", "Silent Running", "Meteor".

Frank Carlucci, 87, American politician, Secretary of Defense (1987–1989), National Security Advisor (1986–1987).

Bunny Carr, 91, Irish television presenter (Quicksilver).

Debbie Lee Carrington, 58, American actress and stunt woman "Return of the Jedi", "Total Recall".

Reg E. Cathey, 59, Emmy winning American actor "House of Cards", "Luke Cage".

Colonel Joseph Gordon Clemons, Jr. USA Ret., 90, American soldier, subject of "Pork Chop Hill".

A1C Adrian Cronauer, USAF Ret., 79, American disc jockey, subject of "Good Morning, Vietnam".

L-R: Professor Stephen Hawking, Margot Kidder, John Mahoney

Steve Ditko, 90, American comic book writer and artist "Spider-Man", "Doctor Strange"
Sir Ken Dodd, 90, English comedian.
Rear Admiral Alene Duerk, USN Ret., 98, American Navy admiral, first female admiral in U.S.Navy.
John M. Dwyer, 83, Oscar/Emmy nominated American set decorator, "Star Trek", "Star Trek: The Next Generation" movies "Star Trek IV, V, Generations, First Contact, Insurrection" and "Nemesis".
Ssgt. (Hon GnySgt.) R. Lee Ermey, USMC Ret., 74, American drill  instructor and actor "Full Metal Jacket", "Toy Story"
Carlos Ezquerra, 70, Spanish comics artist,"Judge Dredd", "Strontium Dog"
Michael D. Ford, 90, Oscar winning English art director and set decorator "Raiders of the Lost Ark", "The Empire Strikes Back".
Miloš Forman, 86, Oscar winning Czech-American film director, "Amadeus".
Gary Friedrich, 75, American comic book writer, "Captain Marvel", "Iron Man" #45–46, co-creator of "Ghost Rider".
Aretha Franklin, 76, 18 time Grammy winning American Hall of Fame singer, "Respect"
William Goldman, 87, Oscar winning American author "The Princess Bride" and screenwriter "Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid".
Leslie "Dirty Den" Grantham, 71, English actor "EastEnders" and convicted murderer.
Korvettenkapitän Reinhard Hardegen, 105, German U-boat commander (Battle of the Atlantic).
Stephen Hawking, 76, English theoretical physicist, professor (University of Cambridge) and writer "A Brief History of Time".
Brig. Gen. Anna Mae Hays, USA Ret., 97, American military officer and nurse, first female U.S. General.

L-R: Derrick O'Connor, Tim O'Connor, David Ogden Stiers

Tom Jago, 93, British liquor executive and distiller, creator of Baileys Irish Cream.

Jóhann Jóhannsson, 48, Icelandic film composer, "Arrival".

Mickey Jones, 76, American drummer and actor.

Ingvar Kamprad, 91, Swedish retail furniture-home design executive and philanthropist, founder of IKEA.

Gloria Katz, 76, American screenwriter and film producer, "American Graffiti", "Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom", "Best Defense".

Margot Kidder, 69, Canadian-American actress, "Superman"

Richard H. Kline, 91, American cinematographer, "Star Trek: The Motion Picture".

Sonny Knowles, 86, Irish singer.

Charles Krauthammer, 68, Pulitzer Prize winning American political commentator (Fox News) and writer (The Washington Post).

Gary Kurtz, 78, American film producer, "American Graffiti", "Star Wars".

Stan Lee, 95, American comic book writer and publisher (Marvel Comics).

Sondra Locke, 74, American actress, "The Outlaw Josey Wales", "Sudden Impact".

John Mahoney, 77, English-American actor, "Frasier".

Winnie Madikizela-Mandela, 81, South African anti-apartheid activist and politician, MP.

Al Matthews, 75, American actor, "Sgt. Apone" in "Aliens".

Bill Maynard, 89, English actor

Sen. John McCain, 81, American politician and Navy officer, member of the U.S. Senate and House of Representatives.

Chuck McCann, 83, American voice actor, "G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero", "Iron Man".

Capt. Ernest Medina, USA Ret., 81, American army officer, commander of unit responsible for the My Lai Massacre.

Donald Moffat, 87, British-born American actor, "The Thing", "Clear and Present Danger", "License to Kill".

Derrick O'Connor, 77, Irish actor, "Lethal Weapon 2", "Daredevil".

Tim O'Connor, 90, American actor, "Buck Rogers in the 25th Century"

William O'Connor, 47, American artist, "Dungeons & Dragons", "Magic: The Gathering".

David Ogden Stiers, 75, American actor "M*A*S*H".

L-R: Soon-Tek Oh, Donnelly Rhodes, John Young

Soon-Tek Oh, 85, South Korean-American actor, "The Man with the Golden Gun", "Missing in Action 2", "Death Wish 4", "The Muta-Do" in "Babylon 5".

Dolores O'Riordan, 46, Irish singer and guitarist, "The Cranberries".

Richard Arvin Overton, 112, American super-centenarian, oldest living World War II veteran in U.S.

Roger Perry, 85, American actor "Star Trek" episode "Tomorrow Is Yesterday" as "Captain John Christopher".

Burt Reynolds, 82, Emmy winning American actor, "Smokey and the Bandit", "Boogie Nights".

Donnelly Rhodes, 80, Canadian actor, ""Doc" Cottle" in "Battlestar Galactica (2004)".

Robert Scheerer, 89, Emmy nominated American director, "Star Trek: The Next Generation", "Star Trek: Deep Space Nine" and "Star Trek: Voyager".

Frank Serafine, 65, American sound designer and editor, "Star Trek: The Motion Picture", "Tron", "The Hunt for Red October".

Marie Severin, 89, American Hall of Fame comic book artist, "Iron Man"#82–83, 85 (inker), #108 (colorist), G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero" #28 (penciller), co-creator of Spider-Woman.

Jon Paul Steuer, 33, American actor "Alexander" in "Star Trek: The Next Generation" episode "Reunion".

Dudley Sutton, 85, British actor, "Lovejoy".

Verne Troyer, 49, American actor, "Austin Powers".

Dame June Whitfield, 93, English actress, "Terry and June".

Scott Wilson, 76, American actor, "The Walking Dead".

Celeste Yarnall, 74, American actress, "Yeoman Martha Landon" in the "Star Trek" episode "The Apple".

Capt John Young, USN Ret. 87, American astronaut (Apollo 16, STS-1).

May they rest in peace.

And now we say goodbye to 2015. A year that redefined marriage as The Supreme Court of the US makes same-sex marriage legal while in Ireland a marriage equality referendum is passed in a landslide victory that hammers yet another nail in the coffin against the most archaic and outdated form of the Catholic establishment which will soon fade into history.

It was also a year of terror attacks felt notably in Kenya and France, of migrant swarms, Iran's nuke deal, Hilary's E-mail, an Earthquake in Nepal and Volkswagen's lies. Bruce becomes Caitlyn, Trump dominates Election 2016, Germanwings 9525, Kogalymavia 9268, the U.S. shakes the hand of Cuba and Ramadi is retaken.

The FCC reclassified retail broadband Internet service as a telecommunications service, a victory for Net Neutrality for now. New Horizon flies by Pluto, Birdman wins Oscars but The Force Awakens wins all.

Many greats are lost including Harve Bennett at 84, producer and writer, the man who saved Star Trek. Leonard Nimoy, 83, actor and director best known for his portrayal of Mr. Spock in many incarnations of Star Trek. Herb Trimpe at 75, a comic book artist who visualised The Incredible Hulk and G.I. Joe and co-created Wolverine. Sir Christopher Lee at 93 the British actor known as Dracula, Saruman and Count Dooku. And most sadly James Horner, untimely at 61, Oscar-winning composer of musical scores for "Titanic", "Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan", "Aliens" and "Apollo 13".

We also remember others we have lost this year.

Hugh Ambrose, 48, American historian and author ("The Pacific")

Gen. Earl E. Anderson USMC, 96, American Marine Corps general who at 53 became the youngest active duty Marine to be promoted to the rank of 4-star general in the history of the USMC

Howard A. Anderson, Jr., 95, American visual effects artist ("Star Trek")

Murphy Anderson, 89, American comic book artist (Superman, Green Lantern), creator of Zatanna

Sir Michael Beetham GCB, CBE, DFC, AFC, DL, 92, British marshal of the air force, Chief of the Air Staff (1977–1982)

Theodore Bikel, 91, Austrian-born American actor (Sergey Rozhenko "Star Trek: The Next Generation")

Admiral Sir John Jeremy Black, GBE, KCB, DSO, captain of the HMS Invincible during the Falklands War

General Sir Edward Burgess KCB, OBE, 87, British army general, Deputy Supreme Allied Commander Europe (1984–1987)

Wesley Burrowes, 85, Irish playwright ("Glenroe")

George Cole, 90, English actor (Arthur Daly "Minder")

George Coe, 86, American actor ("Star Trek: The Next Generation - "First Contact"") Voice Actor (Wheeljack "Transformers: Dark of the Moon" / Doctor Godera "Star Wars: The Old Republic" / various "The Elder Scrolls: Skyrim" and "Guild Wars 2") and original SNL cast member.

Douglas S. Cook, 56, American screenwriter ("The Rock")

Yvonne Craig, 78, American actress ("Batman", "Star Trek") 

Derek Davis, 67, Irish broadcaster

Jim Diamond, 64, Scottish singer-songwriter ("I Should Have Known Better")

Rick Ducommun, 62, Canadian actor ("The 'Burbs", "Die Hard", "The Hunt for Red October")

Brett Ewins, 59, British comic book artist (Judge Dredd, 2000 AD)

Chuck Forsberg, 71, American computer programmer, developer of ZMODEM

Col. James L. Fowler USMC, 84, American military veteran, founded the Marine Corps Marathon

Brian Friel, 86, Irish dramatist ("Philadelphia, Here I Come!", "Dancing at Lughnasa")

Gen. John Galvin U.S. Army, 86, American army general, Supreme Allied Commander Europe (1987–1992)

Alan Howard, 77, English actor (Sauron [The Lord of the Rings])

Maurice Hurley, 75, American television writer and producer ("Star Trek: The Next Generation", "Miami Vice")

Bruce Hyde, 74, American actor (Lieutenant Kevin T. Riley ["Star Trek"])

Sgt. Einar H. Ingman, Jr. U.S. Army, 85, Medal of Honor recipient (Korean War)

George Clayton Johnson, 86, American writer ("Logan's Run", "The Twilight Zone", "Star Trek", "Kung Fu")

B.B. King, American blues singer, guitarist, songwriter, and record producer

Alan Kupperberg, 62, American comic book artist (Robocop #1, Transformers, Star Wars, Iron Man) 

Joseph Lechleider, 82, American, inventor of digital subscriber line (DSL) technology

Grace Lee Whitney, 85, American actress (Yeoman Janice Rand ["Star Trek"])

Lemmy, 70, English rock musician (Motörhead)

Robert Loggia, 85, American actor ("Mancuso: FBI", "Independence Day")

Mick Lynch, Irish indie rock singer (Stump, Bernard)

Don Mankiewicz, 93, American screenwriter ("Star Trek" episode "Court Martial")

Patrick Macnee, 93, English-American actor ("The Avengers", "A View to a Kill")

Bob Minkler, 78, American sound mixer ("Star Wars", "Tron")

Warren Murphy, 81, American author and screenwriter ("Lethal Weapon 2")

John Forbes Nash, Jr., 86, American mathematician (subject of "A Beautiful Mind")

Lt.Gen. William O'Callaghan (DSM), 91, Irish army officer,  Force Commander (United Nations Interim Force in Lebanon

Maureen O'Hara, 95, Irish-American actress and singer ("The Quiet Man")

Bill O'Herlihy, 76, Irish sports broadcaster 

Jerry Parr, 85, American Secret Service agent, extricated Ronald Reagan during assassination attempt,

Roddy Piper, 61, Canadian professional wrestler and actor ("They Live")

Wayne Rogers, 82, American actor ("M*A*S*H")

Pvt. George T. Sakato U.S. Army, 94, American soldier, Medal of Honor recipient

Lt.Col. Edward Saylor USAF, 94, American World War II veteran, member of Doolittle's Raiders.

Omar Sharif, 83, Egyptian actor ("Lawrence of Arabia", "Doctor Zhivago")

Roger Slifer, 60, American comic book author (Co-creator - Lobo) and Animation writer ("G.I. Joe Extreme" / "Transformers")

John Stephenson, 91, American voice actor (Kup, Alpha Trion ["Transformers"] / Hawk, General Flagg, General Franks ["G.I. Joe"]),

Percy Sledge, 74, American R&B, soul, gospel, and traditional pop singer.

Rod Taylor, 84, Australian actor ("Inglourious Basterds", "The Birds")

Nigel Terry, 69, British actor ("Excalibur", "Troy")

Fred Thompson, 73, American politician and actor ("Die Hard 2", "Law & Order", "The Hunt for Red October"), U.S. Senator from Tennessee (1994–2003)

Tom Towles, 65, American actor ("Miami Vice", "The Rock", "Star Trek: Voyager")

Mary Ellen Trainor, 62, American actress ("Lethal Weapon", "Die Hard")

Francis Tsai, 48, American comic book, film and video game concept artist (Dungeons & Dragons, Magic: The Gathering, Spider-Man, TMNT, Myst 3)

Dick Van Patten, 86, American actor ("Spaceballs", "Robin Hood: Men in Tights")

Daniel von Bargen, 64, American actor ("Shaft", "The General's Daughter", G.I. Jane")

Jason Wingreen, 95, American actor ("Star Trek") and voice actor (Boba Fett - "The Empire Strikes Back")

Bernard Williams, 72, British film producer ("Daredevil", "Flash Gordon")

Christopher Wood, 79, English novelist and screenwriter ("Moonraker", "The Spy Who Loved Me")

Robert Z'Dar, 64, American film actor and producer ("Maniac Cop", "Tango & Cash")

May they rest in peace.

And now 

H A P P Y  2 0 1 6

RIP John Cooper

The death has occurred of John Cooper at 73. He was a British comic book artist from West Yorkshire that was most famous for his work in the '70's and '80's. Chances are if you read any British weekly comic books around that period, you'll likely have seen his work as he drew strips for Valiant, Action, Starlord, Tornado, Battle, Eagle and one of the first Judge Dredd strips for 2000AD.

While he's known for Johnny Red and One-Eyed Jack - what I'll remember him for is the hundreds of pages of Action Force which he drew for ICP's Battle: Action Force in the mid 80's featuring all the G.I.Joe characters from that period, long before anyone in this neck of the woods had ever heard of G.I.Joe.

As he wasn't bound as his American counterparts were by the Comics Code Authority, Cooper had free reign to draw everything from realistic bullet wounds to suicide bombers in a comic book based on a child's toy. - And it was fucking awesome! May he rest in peace.

Movie Mini-Reviews 14-05-14

Non-Stop

Liam Neeson plays the role of a clinically depressed, alcoholic U.S. Marshal who’s career is on a knife edge, but when he receives a terrorist threat from someone on the plane he’s guarding he begins a dangerous and completely unsanctioned game of cat and mouse involving an extraordinarily convoluted and unnecessarily porous plot that is sure to incense and annoy the more intelligent of it’s audience.

Overall the movie is a steaming pile of shit but it’s pacing and acting even through even the most ridiculous of situations coupled with the insane dialogue make it somewhat enjoyable. I laughed in disbelief at how nonsensical some of the twists the story took and in the end I just had to accept it for what it was. Truly enjoyable crap.

Watch out for Anson Hell on Wheels Mount who is barely recognisable without his Corin Bohannan beard and Lupita Noyong’o who won an Oscar just 24 hours after I saw the movie and seems far too fine a calibre of actress to be anywhere near this nonsense unless you’re playing the Kevin Bacon game - is simply a token black stewardess here.

Not as good as Taken or even Passenger 57.

Whopper Rating: **1/2

300: Rise of an Empire

This is the not really that much anticipated sequel to Zack Snyder’s seminal 300, based on Frank Miller’s masterwork. As stylish as it’s predecessor with extra blood and dismemberment, 300: Rise of an Empire is a sort of parallel story to 300 focusing on everything but the battle of Thermopylae itself.

Sadly we seem to be entering a phase of cinema where the sequel isn’t actually better than the original. Since the 80’s I’ve been watching movies knowing that the inevitable sequel would be far superior to what spawned it. In a rare occasion, some like RoboCop, The Matrix, Transformers, Delta Force remained supreme but 300 is now added to the list.

Strike Back's Sullivan Stapleton is Themistocles and while he shows promise, he's not yet ready to carry the lead in a movie like this. The sultry Eva Casino Royale Green steals the show as the vicious Artemisia, who despite spitting half her dialogue through her teeth and takes part in what must have been an uncomfortable angry-sex scene - still manages to craft one of the most memorable characters of the genre.

If you enjoyed 300 then you'll be glad you saw this, but it's nowhere near as good.

Whopper Rating: ***1/2

Captain America: The Winter Soldier

As you've seen from the trailers this is a mash up of elements of Brubaker's Winter Soldier with some of the old 1988 Nick Fury Vs S.H.I.E.L.D. book thrown in - but the usual movie-universe differences prevail, such as - all of the characters on screen are in those books - they're just the same, somewhat different or completely different apart from their names.

It's a dark movie and almost devoid of the humour we've seen in all the other films, not a lot to laugh about here. While the original Cap flick had it's "mystical" elements with the Cosmic Cube, this is all hyper technology this time round and a lot less about Cap favouring more SHIELD. In fact there's a lot more SHIELD here than in all the previous Marvel movies together! I think if Tom Clancy had ever penned a superhero book, this is pretty much what it would be - more about technology, politics and weapons than a super-powered bad-ass.

 

Chris Evans is now seems completely comfortable in his character - but still projects that he's a man out of time, but adjusting. He's supported by Scarlett Johansson and Samuel L. Jackson reprising their roles as Black Widow and Nick Fury, franchise newcomer Anthony The Hurt Locker Mackie as Falcon and even Hollywood legend Robert Redford has a role.

Fan service here is monumental, depending on what you've read [or remember what you've read] over the years. You are rewarded for paying attention. Remember, one stinger during the credits - and a small one after all the credits have rolled. It was bit longer than I expected, but thankfully it didn't have the faffing middle bit like Iron Man 3 did. The Avengers is still the best Marvel movie, but this certainly does live up to the hype it's getting. Enjoy.

Whopper Rating: *****+

Can the "B-Team" superheroes step forward?

DC Comics Superman and Marvel's Wolverine returned to the silver screen this summer and I can categorically say they were both substantially better then their previous respective outings. However when you remember that both Brian Singer's Superman Returns and Gavin Hood's X-Men Origins: Wolverine are considered to be next to the worst movies they appeared in [Superman IV and X-Men: The Last Stand taking those distinctions] that's not saying a lot.

Man of Steel

Man of Steel was certainly a different take on the 75 year old American cultural icon once immortalised by Christopher Reeve on screen. Zack 300 Snyder took the reigns to present a more modern-era Superman/Clark Kent [Henry Cavill] who must pursue his destiny as protector of the planet from the evil General Zod [Michael Shannon].

Interestingly, while Snyder gives the character an origin story once again, he does not dwell to much on the characters infancy favouring a considerable look at life on Krypton before and of course during it's destruction. Russell Crowe delivers an outstanding performance as Jor-El during this period of the movie and you regret that it can't be longer. Diane Lane and Kevin Costner step into the parental roles as the Kents with Costner himself shining as the father figure who instilled wisdom into a young Clark.

Cavill himself is "competent" as the man himself, easily surpassing a forgettable Brandon Routh but has nowhere near the charm Christopher Reeve displayed on screen. A complete lack of story development between him and the criminally underused Amy Adams as Lois Lane as well as their relationship being devoid of chemistry is one of the movies major failings.

Despite being a special effects spectacle and sporting the unique sounds of maestro Hans Zimmer the movie fails to reach orbital heights it's title character is able to. The beginning is so utterly superior to the rest of the movie, you want it to be longer and the finale is so completely dragged out and arse-numbingly overlong that it can only delight those with a worryingly short attention span. I'm all for explosions and collateral damage and supermen being through through buildings, but after it happens over a dozen times in the one sequence you want to shout "get on with it!"

There will be a sequel which has been revealed to feature Batman?! Hopefully they've got all the near-pointless destruction out of their system now and well see some character development or at least some semblance of a proper story in the next Man of Steel.

Colonel Creedon Rating: ***1/2

The Wolverine

The Wolverine is a loose adaptation of the mutant's first solo outing by Chris Claremont and Frank Miller from 1982 in which Logan travels to Japan and has a grand adventure featuring The Silver Samurai, lots of Ninjas, Yukio the ronin and of course Mariko his true love.

The Wolverine, like the majority of comic-book movies, does not stick too rigidly to it’s source material. Claremont’s tale provided a framework for Mark Bomback and Scott Frank to craft a screenplay[something that was sorely lacking in the character’s previous solo instalment] and through DP Ross Emery, director James Mangold recreated some of Frank Millar's visceral visuals. If you appreciate a dose of Japanese culture, martial arts, Ninja/Samurai and all that lark in your modern popular culture then you’ll appreciate the type of action on offer here, and I’m confident the movie will go down well in Asian markets.

Hugh Jackman is given a great opportunity to flesh out the character of Logan and I believe the audience is drawn to truly empathise and relate with the character like never before. Given that he’s a roughly 130 year old self-healing mutant that can eject razor sharp claws from his hands, that’s not an inconsiderable writing/acting feat and kudos to all involved. It has escaped previous movies to adequately portray his internal battle as well as his external ones and this is the closest I've seen so far.

Jackman is joined on screen by Famke Janssen reprising her role as the late Jean Grey appearing in a series of haunting dreams and seems adamant that an increasingly depressed Logan join her in death as soon as possible - a feat made difficult due to his longevity and healing factor. Logan is intrigued by the offer made to him by Yashida whose life he saved during WWII, who through medical science may be able to allow Logan to age and die. Naturally, things in such movies are never so simple but if they weren’t then it wouldn’t be much of a movie.

I was certainly happier at how faithful Fox/Marvel were to the character, far more than the previous instalment and sadly a visibly greater effort that than WB/DC achieved with their own hero above.

Colonel Creedon Rating: ****1/2

Iron Man 3, extreme Extremis

There was never any doubt in the universe that there would be a third outing for my favourite super-hero of all after the success of the previous instalments coupled with the cinematic phenomenon that was The Avengers. With the loss of Jon Favreau however, who favoured Cowboys and Aliens [how did that work out Jon?] over bookending one of the greatest trilogies of cinematic history, it meant the quality was uncertain. Even when Fav’s replacement, Shane Black was announced it was met with excitement and trepidation. Black was a very unlikely left-of-field choice to take over as director of something as rich in super-hero lore as Iron Man. The man wrote Lethal Weapon, the excessively dark original movie where Martin Riggs was mentally unhinged and had suicidal tendencies. Black previously directed Downey Jr. in Kiss Kiss Bang Bang so as potential candidates lined up for the job, Downey pushed for Black to take the reins and got him.

For Iron Man 3, Black took the best 'Armoured Avenger' saga from the 2000’s and seamlessly melded it with Marvel-style humour not seen since the 'Bronze Age' of comic books - and it worked! He managed to prevent everything from appearing silly somehow, especially the ideas that could never work in a live action semi-realistic universe. Even I was apprehensive about how Iron Man’s comic book arch-nemesis The Mandarin would be manifested considering he was both personification of pure evil as well as the wielder of 10 magic alien rings! Favreau had earlier avoided The Mandarin citing that the villain was “too fantastical”. Rather than being dismissive of the character outright, Black found a uniquely unorthodox way of dealing with this and the result is nothing short of pure genius - once you get over the initial shock! Black’s own signature wacky white-guy and straight-laced black-guy team-up even made an appearance here as Stark and Rhodey had a shootout with some bad-guys. For a couple of minutes it was like being in a cross between Lethal Weapon and Black’s other masterpiece The Last Boyscout.

Robert Downey Jr. obviously returns as Tony Stark, becoming the oldest actor to play a superhero in modern times. At 47, Downey showed no signs of slowing up and actually had far more action sans-suit in this instalment than any other. Stark’s debilitating issue this time is not the shrapnel near his heart or his over-fondness of fermented vegetable drinks, but instead nightmares and panic attacks borne from his experiences in The Avengers. Additionally, despite his personal growth, he is still a rich asshole who delivers some tactless home-truths to a young boy who helps him on his way. Once again Downey delivers a superb performance as the perpetually flawed Stark, a man who must now regain that which is so easily lost: confidence in oneself.

Stark is backed up by his ever-suffering girlfriend Pepper Potts [Gwyneth Paltrow] and Don Chedle as Colonel James “Rhodey” Rhodes, no longer the sinister-sounding War Machine but the flag waving, Captain America-inspired Iron Patriot! Guy Pierce, someone who up to recently avoided these types of movies turned in a credible performance as a version of Dr. Killian from the Extremis comic-book storyline but it is Sir Ben Kingsley’s mind-fuck performance as the nefarious Mandarin that should net him his most deserved accolades since Ghandi. Supporting this grand adventure are Jon Favreau returning as Happy Hogan, The Pacific’s James Badge Dale portrays Savin, William Die Hard 2 Sadler appears as the POTUS and Paul Bettany’s vocal tones are once again lent to J.A.R.V.I.S. who certainly has more dialog than before.

The action here is probably more infrequent than in previous instalments, with little of note happening until the end of Act 1. However this paves way for more thoughtful character development which many said was lacking in Iron Man 2 in favour of “brainless action”. On the other hand, while it’s easy to understand some individuals disappointment with slower-paced second Act, I can’t fathom why the finale’s extraordinary finale, a true example of classic spectacular super-hero adventure film-making couldn’t turn the most staunch nay-sayer into a true believer unless… …unless they’re dead inside!

It’s far to say Iron Man 3 is more of a direct sequel to The Avengers even though it’s a bookend to an impressive trilogy of movies that are close to rivalling the sheer perfection of The Dark Knight trilogy. We have been with Tony Stark on his incredible journey and while there will likely be another appearance in The Avengers 2 and speculation is mounting on Iron Man 4 considering the phenomenal box-office success of this movie, the chapter in Iron Man’s book that was opened with the first movie in 2008 is now closed. If a new one is opened it should be something unique but bookended in it’s own right so we’re not left hanging when Downey Jr. finally says “I’m too old for this shit” – a distinct possibility considering how tight he rolls with Black who wrote that line before.

Final Verdict: This is a classic end to an explosive adventure and as a true fan of Iron Man I couldn't be happier with this finale. It is easily best written of the trilogy, certainly the darkest and most dramatic and it has the best score - this time from Brian Tyler. It's sagging second act and lack of Scarlett Johannson prevent it from achieving the rating exemption granted to Iron Man 2 however, but it undoubtedly deserves every star of the highest rating possible.

Colonel Creedon rating: *****+

No need to dread Dredd

Unlike the Total Recall remake, this Dredd is not a re-imagining of the 1995 Judge Dredd movie but of the 2000AD comic book source material. Sadly for a lot of people, Sylvester Stallone as Judge Dredd in Danny Cannon’s exceptionally flawed but thoroughly entertaining adaptation of the iconic British comic-book anti-hero is all they know of the character. While the look of the 1995 production was very crisp and it’s comic book origins were clearly obvious in everything from the design of Mega-City One itself to the costumes because they remained faithful to the artistic depiction; Stallone however, slammed a black mark against it by removing Dredd’s helmet about 20 minutes in, irking all fans everywhere. As much as I enjoyed it for a popcorn movie, I was not very upset when I discovered my copy of it succumbed to the otherwise dreaded DVD rot!

A new Judge Dredd movie concept had been bandied about for a while, once it was clear that there’d by no sequel to Cannon/Stallone’s effort. Eventually details emerged which cast Karl Doom/Star Trek Urban as the futuristic lawman but interestingly in a low-budget independent British production to be shot in South Africa. This intrigued everyone of course; people want Dredd on screen more than most other comic book characters - but surely not without the detailed neon and grime filled futuristic setting of Mega City One enabled only by several hundred million dollars today? If we had to lose that then there would have to be a story of such exceptional quality, strong characters and/or excessive violence for us to ignore the low budget shortcomings. Did we get that? No, but close. I do think we got was a thematically superior movie that certainly sated the lust for violence all true Dredd fans have.

 

The plot to this movie is exceedingly simple: street judge veteran Judge Dredd and his new psychic 'mutie' young rookie partner Anderson [Olivia Thirlby] are sent to investigate a triple-homicide in the lovely sounding 'Peach Tree' block, a 200-floor tower filled with normal everyday citizens and naturally a generous helping of depraved scum and villainy. After arresting a suspect, the block's criminal overlord Ma-Ma initiates a lock down of the building until the judges are captured or killed prompting everyone in the building with a weapon to hunt them down. The judges, without much hope of rescue must play a game of cat and mouse survival to obtain their freedom. 

Urban delivers a near-perfect representation of Dredd from the comic books. His voice is pretty much what can be expected, Urban's own variation of Eastwood much in the same vein as Bale did Batman. He managed to make "I'm the law" a more character defining statement than Stallone's "I am the Law" which, while is the more correct phrase, was delivered as a laughable punchline in comparison to Urban's gravitas. Urban was emphatic about keeping Dredd's helmet on and fans will be pleased to know that it's never taken off. This lead the actor to have the unenviable task of acting the entire movie with just his mouth and vocal inflections. The fact that Dredd has never been one for smiling, laughing or positive emotion for that matter - meant that Urban had pretty much to portray the character with a half dozen different types of scowl.

 

Dredd also starred Lena Game of Thrones Heady who delivers a terrific performance as the criminal master-mind Ma-Ma, a former prostitute who was disfigured by her pimp before she killed him and took control of her own empire. Thirlby who has been doing movies I've only vaguely heard of since 2006 was a great Cassandra Anderson, eager to prove herself to her mentor Dredd. Doctor Who and Holby City's Rakie Ayola turns in a cameo as a Chief Judge. 

Alex 28 Days Later Garland began writing Dredd in 2006, over two years before the movie's announcement. Pete Vantage Point Travis who is also well regarded as the director of the acclaimed 1994 TV movie Omagh, took the helm of Dredd and brought a very different style to the project that one would have expected. His work on Endgame in South Africa in 2008 obviously prompted him to perceive a new vision for MC1 which he has now brought to the screen. Design wise however I must level my most major criticism with this movie. Mega City One unfortunately did not seem all that "mega". I knew that due to the small budget we'd not see anything close to a faithful representation of MC1 from the strip but it is such a central core element of Dredd that I feel that there is something huge missing from the movie. I don't think an orchestral score would have fit this at all, so no Alan Silvestri, but felt Paul Leonard Limitless Morgan's choice of representing the score with industrialised sequencing was poor.

 

There are glaringly obvious similarities between this movie and this year's earlier video-game-like killing fest The Raid. While The Raid may have been released first, development and principal photography of Dredd predates it. There's also no doubt that The Raid was a woefully disappointing mess at least to people who know what they're talking about, while Dredd has actual character development, a plot, real acting, cohesive direction and has Gatling guns.

Final Verdict: Extremely violent and faithful take on a day in the life of Judge Dredd.

Colonel Creedon Rating: ****

The Dark Knight has Risen

 

Batman, The Dark Knight of Gotham is here for this third and final outing under the direction of Christopher Nolan. The wait was long, punctuated by the usually glossy hype that surrounds a movie of this calibre. With the first two instalments of Nolan’s Batman trilogy being heralded as being among the greatest movies of all time, the pressure was certainly on the British director to deliver a fitting end to such an amazing saga, a trifecta of intellectual depth, superb action and astounding technical achievement. Thankfully Nolan delivered all, in spades.

Uniquely, The Dark Knight Rises is as much a sequel to Batman Begins as it is to The Dark Knight before it with a multitude of threads in this intricate celluloid tapestry being woven together in one spectacular whole. Here Bruce Wayne must now face his mortality in a way that he hadn’t faced it before and must regain the physical and spiritual connection with Gotham City he possessed before his fall from grace. This fall of course itself a lie borne by his greatest ally Jim Gordon, but not for much longer. Now a haggard and limping social recluse, Wayne has all but forgotten the Batman as Gotham has achieved an almost Utopian level of lawfulness. However a new threat seeks to raise an army to wrest control of the city to a truly nefarious end. The Dark Knight Rises explores many themes but chief among them is that “anyone can be Batman” something that has been cemented throughout the trilogy.

Christian Bale’s performance is as good as he’s been giving throughout the series which sadly means he hasn’t evolved a great deal himself. This is a pity as The Fighter proved what an incredible actor he can be. Bale was outdone once again by Gary Oldman who portrayed a much older Gordon now wrestling with his conscience at the terrible burden of lies he bore. Joseph Gordon Levitt shone as Blake, a streetwise cop whom Gordon makes a detective and to whom he transfers much of the footwork he’s unable to do himself. Anne Hathaway, initially regarded as a strange choice for Catwoman, without even so much as a purr made us all but forget Michelle Pfeiffer’s shiny PVC catsuit from Batman Returns. In fact she nailed it so delectably perfectly that there have been numerous calls for her to take her character into her own movie [undoubtedly to fare better than Halle Berry’s misguided crime against film]. Tom Hardy bulked up for his role as the imposing Bane, the menacing anarchist. Despite sometimes being somewhat difficult to understand he lent a powerful performance to the legendary “Knightfall” saga Batman villain, “the man who broke the bat”.

Supporting them, another Inception alumni, Marion Collitard whom I genuinely dislike as an actress, yet wasn’t too put off from her admittedly ‘above standard’ performance here. Matthew Modine, another actor I care quite little for portrays Foley, Gotham’s chief of Detectives and while his character is not one we should be impressed with, I have to say kudos for Modine for a great interpretation. Returning for his final time, Morgan Freeman as Lucius Fox, Batman’s answer to “Q” from James Bond, lending credence to the oft asked “Where does he get those wonderful toys?” and provides The Dark Knight with his most impressive vehicle yet, The Bat. However it was Michael Caine who really stepped it up this time around as Alfred and delivered something no less than Oscar-worthy proving that unlike some of the latest efforts from peers Anthony Hopkins and Ben Kingsley it is Caine that truly deserves to be called a “Sir”.

While sadly due to the London Olympics, I was denied a comfortable chance at witnessing Rises in Imax, but it was easy to spot at which points Nolan chose to switch to the extraordinary format adding to the immersion of the world he created as he did with Inception before it. There was some extraordinary CGI work done for a movie that while fantastical, is fused with the modern reality. The camera glided over Gotham and the scale of the troubled city was clearly established, albeit with some reality bending CGI [those exploded bridges aren’t really that long according to Constance]. 

To aid in the crafting of Gotham and to aid in a cohesion of design quality, Nathan Crowley returned from the previous two movies to lend his production design talents transforming Pittsburgh into a modern and realistic Gotham City. While he had collaborated with the excellent James Newton Howard for the previous instalments, Hans Zimmer was left to his own devices for the final instalment and it shows. Unleashed and solo, Zimmer has a tendency to go off the musical rails and while an excellent score in its own right, it lacks a cohesion that Newton Howard obviously brought to the fore.

It’s often the case in Hollywood where the third movie of a franchise isn’t as good as the others but this movie series has had the benefit of the same production value and creative team for all of them and it shows that there was no creative expense spared for the grand finale of this spectacular saga. If I was to level any criticism at it, I would have to say that it did indeed run a little too long at 165 mins, The Dark Knight had it right at about 150 mins, still epic but that quarter of an hour can make all the difference and there's a few bits that could have been shaved from the middle. It may hold true that when compared with the others in other ways, that Rises is not the best of the three but when you’re talking about movies that are as close in quality as these three Batman movies then it is still a sublime manifestation of an extraordinary creative effort made whole and produced a true genre-defining movie that transcends everything one hoped.

 

Final Verdict: Stay away from this if you don’t like epic movies over 2.5 hours long and want your super-heroes to ever seem real, because this is what this movie actually does.

Colonel Creedon Rating: *****

Deliberately Untitled

Nowadays I try to stay away from commentary on the kinds of atrocities that sick and disturbed individuals commit on groups of unsuspecting innocents such as the tragedy which unfolded in Aurora, Colorado not 48 hours ago.

I'm presuming by now that everyone has seen the usual awful media frenzy that surrounds this type of tragedy and are aware of the events. A young man apparently legally purchased an AR-15 assault rifle, a shotgun and a .40 Cal Glock and hundreds of rounds of ammunition within the last two months. He put on a mask and body armour, called himself "The Joker" and proceeded into a midnight showing of The Dark Knight Rises shooting and killing 12 people and wounding almost 60 others.

Normally I'm glad when the perpetrator turns the gun on themselves or is taken down in a permanent fashion by the police. However in this one instance I'm glad he wasn't because he was able to inform the police that his apartment was booby-trapped, possibly averting the deaths of subsequent investigators. I'm also delighted that Colorado has the death penalty, only unfortunately it's a "humane" kind... something that this bastard did not allow his victims.

My condolences go out to the families of the victims of this senseless tragedy, sentiments echoed by many other influential people. The US Department of Defense released a statement yesterday: "...Our thoughts and prayers are with the victims and the families of those impacted by this event. One sailor was injured and one, known to have been at the theatre that evening, is currently unaccounted for.  Two airmen were injured in the incident.  The Navy and the Air Force are working with the families of these service members to ensure they have the care and attention they need." I've since learned that the unaccounted for sailor was one of the victims, Petty Officer John Larimer, 27. 

Chuck Rozanski, President of Mile High Comics of Denver, Colorado [the outlet from which I have purchased much of my considerable Iron Man collection] also expressed condolences, and was relieved that none of his staff, their families or friends were victims of the incident and considers that his choice of local theatre for his midnight viewing was the right one: "I was at a different movie theater last night with my wife, daughter and her fiancé. Had the shooter chosen to instead make the quick drive from Aurora to Boulder, the horror of last night could have easily been ours to bear..." Rozanski however wants to help those less fortunate: "it is clear by the fact that they were willing to attend a midnight showing of The Dark Knight Rises that they were, at least by some measure, comics fans. That being the case, I think that it is beholden upon all of us in the comics world to pull together to help them in their time of need. For the families of the dead, we want to help with funeral expenses. For the wounded, we want to help with medical bills." and so 10% of all proceeds from the current Mile High Comics sale will be placed in a fund for them.

As you can imagine, director Christopher Nolan was upset and calling the shooting an appalling crime said: "I believe movies are one of the great American art forms and the shared experience of watching a story unfold on screen is an important and joyful pastime. The movie theater is my home, and the idea that someone would violate that innocent and hopeful place in such an unbearably savage way is devastating to me." Oscar winning composer Hans Zimmer said: "I was going to send a note to Chris [Nolan] ... but I didn't have the words. Suddenly, words become meaningless because it's so beyond anything."

I finish with the words of wisdom... nay - a 'call to arms' from long time contributor and friend Bruce Russell: "Everyone, please go to a movie this weekend. Don't let one lunatic impact your life in a negative way. Go see Amazing Spider-Man, The Dark Knight Rises, Madagascar 3, whatever. Do your bit."

If you ever hear the phrase more than the sum of it’s parts, from now on add “…just like The Avengers!”

Ever since Nick Fury emerged from the shadows of Tony Stark’s mansion after the end credits of the original Iron Man in 2008, we were presented with the reality that The Avengers were coming to town and would appear on screen for the first time. It took six more years, an origin movie for both Thor and Captain America, plus another Iron Man and Hulk movie to set the tone and establish a linear momentum of hype. And boy did it pay off!

When you look at the individual movies, you can see that they were quite extraordinary undertakings. Marvel’s big screen treatment of their beloved comic-book heroes are practically flawless examples of how to treat the superhero genre properly, not in the deplorable fashion that DC Comics has with their movie projects since Batman Forever [Nolan’s sublime Batman efforts excluded of course]. Each Marvel/Paramount movie introduced and/or expanded The Avengers splendidly and wove in a backbone with Nick Fury, Agent Coulson and/or S.H.I.E.L.D. to keep the movies - while separate extraordinary adventures in their own right – part of a glorious cohesive universe much like their source material.

 Chris Evans played his Steve Rogers brilliantly as a man from the past, understanding little about the time he now resides but comes into his own when the going gets tough because the language of war has changed little. Chris Hemsworth turns in a much more serious performance than he did under Brannagh, evoking the responsibility he feels for his younger brother Loki and the Tesseract, unleashing such devastation on an unprepared world. While sadly The Incredible Hulk’s Edward Norton could not reprise his role as Bruce Banner, no one had had anything bad to say about Mark Ruffalo, once presumed to be the weakest link in The Avengers’ chain but who delivered a provocative and sublime performance as a man controlling constant anger, unleashing it only… to SMASH! However, there must be one star that shines above all else and that firmly belonged to Robert Downey Jr. who is now so comfortable in Tony Stark’s shoes it’s difficult to know where Downey ends and Stark begins.

The clandestine extra-governmental security agency S.H.I.E.L.D. were a major part of the movie and provided an array of great supporting characters to the big four. Samuel L. Jackson’s Nick Fury opened the movie leading the now familiar Agent Coulson [Clark Gregg], Clint “Hawkeye” Barton [the intense Jeremy Renner] from Thor and the stunning Scarlet Johansson as Natalia “Black Widow” Romanoff. Stellan Skarsgard returns as Professor Selvig from Thor and Gwyneth Paltrow reprises her role as Pepper Potts as does Paul Bettany as the voice of Jarvis. Joining them for the first time is Cobie Smulders as Agent Maria Hill, S.H.I.E.L.D.’s XO. The exquisitely sinister Tom Hiddleston returns from Thor as Loki but it's soon made clear he's only part of the real threat.

Despite all his groundwork being laid and the usual superhero origin baggage already jettisoned, The Avengers director/screenwriter Joss Whedon’s job was not without obstacles. He had to co-write a tale with such scope as to not only encompass the ideals and personalities of the heroic Avengers but make a epic spectacle worthy of them as a whole. He flawlessly crafted the movie to take advantage of each individual characters personality, power, charm and ethos in such a way that allowed them to amalgamate as one, while retaining what makes each character unique. It's not without merit to say that the greatest worry of fans worldwide was that this could not be accomplished. I do not believe that any character overshadowed another and a fan of any of the characters would be well pleased by the offering here, continuing their adventure and expanding their horizon beyond the realm of what could be expected even by the most ardent fan. Many had their doubts that this could be pulled off in an adequate fashion and that Whedon’s true magic could only be woven on the small screen, but by the time the final credits rolled the nay-sayers were put in their place and few can argue against his phenomenal accomplishment.

This magnificent celluloid spectacle is flawless in every way and I take great pleasure in naming it one of the greatest movies I've ever seen.

Colonel Creedon rating: EXEMPTION GRANTED

Dragon*Con 2011

On September 2nd 1864 the forces of Union General William T. Sherman marched  into Atlanta, Georgia, one day after the Confederates evacuate the city. Exactly 147 years later, the people of Atlanta stood aside as a 40,000+ force of fans of Science Fiction, Fantasy, TV shows, Games, Comic Books and Movies descended on downtown Atlanta and literally became an occupying force of five of the largest hotel complexes I've ever been in.

The crowds before rush hour. Photo by Mark Twomey, used with permission.

It was Bruce Russell who demanded that Mark and I fly to Atlanta to join him and his buddies, Jer and Sean, at the 25th annual Dragon*Con. We were joined by Constance who helped us navigate the colossal space invaded by thousands of people just like ourselves. The experience was an assault on the senses, hundreds of attendees, many dressed in sometimes elaborate costumes from all aspects of popular culture from fully armoured Imperial Stormtroopers to scantily clad Anime girls, moved as a crowd like a river of colour through the hotel lobbies, skywalks and convention centres on their way to get their own experiences.

In the Navy! Yes this bloke likes G.I.Joe even more than I. Photo by Mark Twomey

Many celebrities wandered amongst us, themselves seeking hero worship on their way to a panel or a fast buck from autographing pictures. We spotted the muscular Lou The Incredible Hulk Ferrigno riding an escalator, Laura Smallville Vandervoort, who really is as pretty as she is on screen, was walking about with V co-star Joel Taken Gretsch [who is also William Shatner's son-in-law]. A wide-eyed Robert Nightmare on Elm Street Englund and a haggard-looking Lance Aliens Henrickson took a wrong turning out a door into a sea of people and were promptly ushered through another door by quick thinking staff before the stars were too mobbed.

Some less-than-iconic stars like flame haired Felicia The Guild Day and a newly lean David Stargate: Universe Blue mingled after hours in the party-like atmosphere that formed each evening in all locations. There was as much to see at night as there was by day. Drink flowed from many locations catering for thousands, it was even served from an automated BAR-2-D-2 droid. Goth and Steampunk themed bands put on concerts for those who wished to dance the night away - lightsabers in the air. Some retired early however, regenerating themselves for the next hectic day of adventure.

Well holding up cigarette lighters would be a fire hazard.

Several dealers rooms were established where companies and individuals gathered and set up stalls to hawk their much-sought wares. Literally everything imaginable was available; from Superhero belt-buckles to Star Trek costumes, real metal fantasy and anime-themed swords and blades, valuable comic books and graphic novels, DVDs of almost forgotten yet beloved cartoons, trading cards, patches, badges, action-figures, posters, t-shirts and games. There was also an abundance of hand-made unique goods such as corsets, leather-ware, steampunk devices, jewelery and even kilts!

One room, "The Hall of Fame" was set up where you could go to meet the stars present and get a personalised autograph. I met Sean Patrick Young Indiana Jones Flanery, Eddie Warehouse 13 McClintock and the fascinating Richard Battlestar Galactica Hatch. I myself sought only two autographs - those of Michael Battlestar Galactia Hogan who scribbled "Frak Em All" on a Colonel Tigh picture for me and of course Erin Buck Rogers Grey who still looks stunning at 61 and whom I hope I didn't scare with my nervous dribbling. One true gentleman whom I must mention is Tahmoh Battlestar Galactica Penikett who waived his autograph fee on a picture for a friend of Constance who survived cancer.

Bill Shatner having fun. Photo via Dragon*Con

Finally it was the panels themselves that were of most interest. One may have to queue for an hour in the blistering 36°C heat to get a good seat, or what we did was to wait in relative comfort until the queue had dissipated and one could simply sit in the back and listen to the fascinating tales and memories recounted by the likes of William Star Trek Shatner and Carrie Star Wars Fisher. Shatner is doing well for a man of 80 and had some fascinating insight into his work. He also told us that he has discovered that most people in attendance had not come to the con to see him, but to see each other and that he was glad to be a part of that. Carrie Fisher was equally fascinating and a lot more R-rated in her speech than Shatner. She is conscious that her battles with her weight and drug abuse have taken their toll on her star, but she has made it her mission to educate people on such pitfalls.

G.I.Joe / Iron Man artist Tom Feister's panel got way out of hand.

All in all it was a fascinating worthwhile experience and an excellent primer before I dare brave the San Diego Comic Con at some point in the future. I will however look forward to returning to Dragon*Con and to Bruce and the boys in a few years for even more adventures.

Green Lantern's day ain't too bright!

If you're a DC Comics superhero these days and someone says they're going adapt you for TV or a movie, my advice is: unless you're Batman, you should decline politely. Superman's last big-screen outing was an unmitigated disaster and they've just shit-canned David E. Kelly's attempt at bringing Wonder Woman to TV. They're going to try Superman again, bless 'em, but before that they decided to unleash one of their lesser known secondary characters upon the masses for the first time.

His name is the Green Lantern and he has the power to create “constructs” which are fully working manifestations of his imagination [albeit bright green]. These can take the form of cars, swords, anti-aircraft weapons or giant fists [and DC threw in the power of space flight because allowing him to imagine a rocket ship would have made the character cooler than Superman]. I’ve read very few Green Lantern comic books and most of those were in the mid-‘80s but a few years ago Mark forced me to read some of his graphic novels. In comparison to my normal reading material, I found them uninspiring, bland and quickly forgotten – much like this movie will be in a few years I suspect.

Sadly, Green Lantern begins in the most clichéd, predictable and derivative way possible – Ace fighter pilot Hal Jordan [Ryan Reynolds] suffers engine failure during some aerial manoeuvres and is rapidly losing his battle with gravity. As he plunges, we are treated to some black and white footage of Hal’s father waving at his son before he takes off on his own fateful flight and for a moment I thought I was watching JAG again with bits of Iron Eagle or a movie of it's ilk. For me, the movie never recovered from this and I could find no way of reconciling Hal's actions with that of a normal human being with any form of common sense. For example, the dying Lantern Abin-Sur crashes on earth [our satellites don’t detect him and somehow no one sees his ship even though he crashes on the coast of the US, in a populated region, in daylight] and sends his ring to find someone worthy. It finds Hal and brings him to the crash site [which still hasn’t been found even though enough time has passed to make it dark now].

Yes look, I know I'm nitpicking; I can let a few things go in most of the shite I love, that's for certain, but sometimes things are just too blatantly obviously bad to enjoy it the way it was meant to be and it just stops being fun. I cannot separate fantasy from madness - and this movie was sheer madness on many scales.

It was obvious in places that several different special effects houses were used to finish the movie, even without it being highly publicised that there was a rush-job going on for the last few months. While the animators of Hal's first flight sequence are not even qualified to work with MS Paint, I will tip my hat to the people responsible for animating the villain Parallax who was truly frightening but sadly wasted on this movie.

Poor Ryan Reynolds, he’s had so many great opportunities since Van Wilder. He’s not only had Scarjo, one of the most desirable women in the world but he’s the first person to play both a Marvel and a DC Comics hero in movies. As lacklustre as Green Lantern is however it is nowhere near as bad as what Reynolds was reduced to in the celluloid mangling of Deadpool, Marvel’s wisecracking mercenary in X-Men Origins: Wolverine. No, nothing is that bad, but sadly Lantern is far from Reynolds' finest hour – and it should be!!! What in sweet Lucas is wrong with DC/Warners and their superhero movies? They’re a one-trick wonder with the current Dark Knight franchise which outclasses everything Marvel has done but that’s it! It’s like there’s no effort with anything else apart from their DVD/BD animated movies.

Final Verdict: Mildly entertaining, but ultimately unimpressive. I’ll be honest, I can’t recommend you see this in cinemas, or even buy the Blu but it may be worth your while to check out a HD-Digital download or something, if you just want to watch something new.

Colonel Creedon Rating: **1/2

PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT ON BEHALF OF UNETIDA

Upon discovering a crashed Extra Terrestrial vessel with a live pilot:

1. Do not approach the vehicle
2. Do not enter the vehicle
3. Do not speak to the pilot
4. Do not touch the pilot
5. Do not remove artifacts from the vehicle
6. Call 1-800-555-WHOPPER and report your location immediately.