Saturday, April 08, 2006

DiCaprio Star Wars Toys - Update

As previously reported, Leonardo DiCaprio put his Star Wars collection up for auction recently. What we did want to know was why? Well apparently it was to benefit his foundation devoted to environmental protection. The figures, raised just over $100,000 for the foundation, according to Dan Morphy, the auction company's chief operating officer.

DiCaprio, who was on location in Africa last week, was "very pleased with the results," Morphy said."

"I don't care about the enviornment", Colonel Creedon said in a statement "..and (DiCaprio) still can't act"

21 comments:

vaughan said...

bastard selling his figures over the net and he was in africa , he didn't even care enough to be there personally , probably got one of his "assistants" to do it , and where does the money go , to the enviroment , god damn tree huggers , of course he drives a prius as well y'know ...electric car tree hugging hippie......hang on 100000!?!?!?! Col how much have you raised selling yours again?

sith apologist said...

We all know the Colonels stance on the environment - he smokes cigars and would love to be drive about in a stretch-hummer.

Lt. Colonel Creedon said...

@ Vaughan: About 500Eur which I used to my my new sword.

@ Sith: Too right man.

sith apologist said...

Wow, a sword? You got a sword? Show us?

Lt. Colonel Creedon said...

I'm sure you'll see it in a pretentious photograph somewhere soon enough.

Civilian Overseer said...

Guys, I thought the days of the Colonel's prosthetic where long gone.

I was wrong.

The following is all supposition, but hell, that’s a good place as any to start an unfounded rumour.

The Colonel obviously suffers from a form of shell-shock, brought on by seeing all the other Cadets in the shower in basic training no doubt.

Such trauma, causes the Colonel to seek bigger and deadlier equipment and a psychotic hatred of those better equipped than himself.

Maybe this is the real reason that he left Master Guns behind, he felt threaten by such over powering ordinance at his back.

Lads, this just confirms, what a hero the Colonel has been over his career, all these years suffering in silence, never letting on, just quietly eliminating the men under his command with bigger weapons.

This also explains the 100% causality rate.

I say we rally round the Colonel now in his hour of need. What shall We call his new toy?, my own humble suggestion is the "Colonel's Metaphor"

Sithy, What do you think?,
Guns, Now you know the real reason why the Colonel abandoned you to those ass rapists cannibals, can you forgive and forget?

Lt. Colonel Creedon said...

I take it that you're not too busy at work these days Civvy?

Civilian Overseer said...

Had the day off. I note you don't denie the charges. ;)

Lt. Colonel Creedon said...

Fair enough. I formally deny them. I'm only sorry that by denying them I'm actually lending some acknowledgement to something so absurd.

Civilian Overseer said...

Well done Colonel!, Acknowledging that a problem exists is the first step on the long road to recovery.

It takes guts to move on to step two, accepting the problem.

I believe you can do it.

sith apologist said...

I think his "penis-extension TV" is another symptom.

Master Guns said...

What about big fuckin' cigar he has in his new portrait?

Civilian Overseer said...

Well spotted Guns, brings new meaning to the expression "Smoke 'em, if you got 'em" ;)

I note that the Colonel gave 4 stars to the movie, "Inside Man", could this be a freundian slip?

sith apologist said...

Also ... I don't know if you've heard the way he says "oh yeah" whilst firing 'magnificent handguns'.
I believe that the Colonel's Metaphor is here to stay.

Lt. Colonel Creedon said...

I deny ever saying "oh yeah" when discharging my weapons. I'll admit only to repeating the word "yes" several times slowly and loudly and sometimes inserting an 'h' sound to create a multi-syllable word: Yeheheesss!

sith apologist said...

Your explanation does nothing to lessen how perverse it sounds.

Civilian Overseer said...

In fact it only serves to strenghen our conviction that something is amiss in the "Colonel's personal arsenal"

Tell me Colonel, do you love the smell of overcompensation in the morning?, does it smell of Victory?

Master Guns said...

The only thing the Colonel smells in the morning is the stench of his sweat after another sleepless night filled with the images of all the men he let behind...

Civilian Overseer said...

Guns, Yes, insomnia is often a side effect when we are seperated from loved ones but is the Colonel capable of such emotions?

sith apologist said...

Given the topic of conversation of late, I feel obliged to now ask: is this "sword" you bought part of The Colonel's Metaphor, or is it a genuine sword? The topics around of ate suggest that discussion of phallic objects will go down ... er... well.
I didn't plan that last pun, honest!

Lt. Colonel Creedon said...

It's not a metaphor. It's a genuine United States Marine Corps Officer's "Mameluke" saber worth about US$500.