Wednesday, January 04, 2006

The Whopper Awards 2005 - Part 5

The Nominees For Best Writing:
Anne Cofell Saunders: Battlestar Galactica (TV Show) EP2.10 “Pegasus
David Cage: Fahrenheit (Video Game)
Shane Black: Kiss Kiss Bang Bang (Motion Picture)
Frank Miller: Sin City (Motion Picture)

This was perhaps my most difficult decision of the whole contest. The standard of original writing this year has been exemplary. The writing for the Battlestar Galactica mid-season cliff-hanger “The Pegasus” was the best for any TV show I had seen in many years. David Cage’s Fahrenheit proved that a well written video game can be just as good as one with the best graphics. The script for Kiss Kiss Bang Bang was like a breath of fresh air to the Stagnant writing of Hollywood, a wecome return for Shane Black after his self-imposed exile. The award for best writing however must go to Frank Miller- forgiven for writing Robocop 2 back in 1990, he adapted his best selling Sin City comic book series for the big screen. That said he didn’t do too much adapting as it seems that what he wrote for the comic books is exactly what’s on the screen, I guess if it ain't broke: don't fix it!


The Nominees For Best Director:
Micheal Bay: The Island
Tim Burton: Charlie And The Chocolate Factory
Peter Jackson: King Kong
Robert Rodriguez, Frank Miller and Quentin Tarantino: Sin City

Micheal Bay has done it again- over use of slow motion, black helicopters, generous helping of automatic weapons filre, insane speed chases, fantastic set-pieces and an abundance of pyrotechnics; if he left one of those things out of The Island then he wouldn’t have won this award.

The Nominees for Best Cinematography:
Dean Semler: Stealth
Sergei Trofimov: Nochnoy dozor
Philippe Rousselot: Charlie And The Chocolate Factory
Andrew Lesnie & Derek Whipple: King Kong

If you take a look at the lighting, contrast, hues and camera angles in the Russian film Nochnoy dozor (Night Watch) and don't think Sergei should be given this award then you havn't got a fuckin' clue about the art of cimematography and I spit on thee.

In the penultimate part: Best Film, Game and TV Show...

10 comments:

vaughan said...

Have you noticed I am the only one commenting on your award selections , I'm not sying nobody really cares but........

vaughan said...

I meant to write saying .....anyway ah yes Mr Bay Takes The award, no surprises there then.I am actually defending this choice as this is the Colonels selection and no one else's ,if it wasn't that hack Bay then we would know Creedon wasn't really in charge of the awards wouldn't we!

Lt. Colonel Creedon said...

Not everyone has returned to the net after the holidays yet. Most of my contributers prefer to waste time at work or college reading this shit, as opposed to wasting valuable time at home.

Now I've built it... they will come...

Master Guns said...

I'm waiting until they're all awarded. I want to guage how much of your mind you've really lost!

sith apologist said...

How about an award for "Most Men Left Behind?"

Aaron said...

Maybe if we are lucky Bay will get the next Resident Evil Gig, what a treat that would be...............

Lt. Colonel Creedon said...

Oh you're freaking wonderful Sith Apologist. We wait days for you to come back after the holidays and this is what you open with? You disappoint me!

Lt. Colonel Creedon said...

Mike Bay and Zombies Aaron? I dunno. I suppose it's about as strange as Mike Bay and 50 foot tall robots.

He better not screw up Transformers, I'd hate to be mad at him!

sith apologist said...

I watched the original Transformers the movie last week, and I can now officially say that it didn't happen in 2005. No walking talking robots, no planet eating entities, no passing of the matrix. Unless there was a large media cover-up silencing activities in Oregon.

Just wondering if the Colonel feels The Island would have been improved by a pointless but enjoyable "Jordan Two Delta explores her body in the shower" scene?

Lt. Colonel Creedon said...

No there'd have been somthing on FOX News about it.

I agree that The Island would have been improved by a pointless but enjoyable "Jordan Two Delta explores her body in the shower" scene. But it was still one of the best movies of the year without it.