Tuesday, June 05, 2012

Time to kill more bugs!

UNETIDA and UNPASID are investigating either an invasion of extra-terrestrial arachnids or a  dastardly genetic engineering/cloning experiment gone awry in remote remote northeast India.

For the past few weeks, swarms of large jumping and biting venomous spiders have caused panic in  the town of Sadiya in Assam state. On the evening of May 8, as townspeople were celebrating a Hindu festival, swarms of spiders suddenly appeared and attacked them.

Local man Purnakanta Buragohain and an unnamed school boy died after being bitten by the spiders over the following few days. It may be that the victims died after witch doctors used razor blades to drain the wounds and it has not yet been confirmed that the deaths are from from spider poison or from the attempted treatment as the bodies were cremated before autopsies could be done.

Scores more people turned up at the town's hospital with spider bites and another seven bite victims have been treated with antibiotics against infection after they also tried themselves to drain their wounds, said Dr. Anil Phapowali at the local Sadiya town hospital. Local resident Jintu Gogoi spent a day in the hospital complaining of excruciating pain and nausea after being bitten.

Locals say the most terrifying aspect is that spiders appear in swarms and their behavior is highly aggressive. "It leaps at anything that comes close. Some of the victims claimed the spider latched on to them after biting. If that is so, it needs to be dealt with carefully. The chelicerae and fangs of this critter are quite powerful," head of the department of life sciences at Dibrugarh University Dr. L.R. Saikia said. "It looks like a new species. We haven't been able to identify it."

As the spiders were certainly not native to the area and as there is no record of venomous spiders in the region, science and eradication teams from UNETIDA and UNPASID were immediately dispatched to investigate the incidents but have yet to prepare a public report. Brigade General "Boogyman" Rojas, UNPASID Director of Operations has confirmed that his teams of specialists are working with UNETIDA in containing the arachnid threat.

Meanwhile, villagers are keeping lamps on at night and standing guard against spiders entering their mud-and-thatch huts.

Sources: AFP / FOX News

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