Monday, February 02, 2009

SUPERBOWL TRAILERS

I love the Superbowl. I may never have watched a football game in my life, but I still love the Superbowl. Why? Because the networks pull out all the stops and put their best shows and especially we see new TV-Spots for upcoming movies like these:


Star Trek


G.I.Joe: The Rise Of Cobra


Transformers: Revenge Of The Fallen


Fast & Furious


Land Of The Lost




Sometimes these trailers are removed, do a search on YouTube to find mirrors.

11 comments:

Constance said...

Hellooooo! "Colonel" Creedon! Land of the Lost?

Constance said...

oooh! Did you get your 3-D glasses?

vaughan said...

Constance ...what is this thing called Land of the lost?..seriously no one here ever saw Land of the Lost( I don't think the BBC showed it either, our crap fantasy show experience here was an American series called Mysterious Island ..a show so bad that in 1985 thanks to kids complaints , it was pulled and ceremoniously the film stock it was on burned live on Saturday Morning TV ...no I am not joking) so you can't expect the Colonel to get excited about it...now if it was a CHiPS I can assure you The Colonel wouldn't shut up.....he might even wear the CHIPS outfit he had when he was Five..he boasts how he still has the gun from it y'know.

Constance said...

Okay Vaughan. I'll do my best. It's also possible that you and the col are simply too young to remember the series. This show was on about 10 years earlier than your Mysterious Island thingy.

Lemme see if I can set the scene for you:

It was the early 1970s. Sid and Marty Krofft's bizarre and sometimes frightening televisic offerings are rampant on American Saturday morning children's tv.

Imagine an opening sequence with a family of three in a canoe, serenely paddling down a river. Very shaggy haired dad in safari gear, an older brother, and a younger blonde sister. They're paddling down the river while the theme song does the story origin exposition "Something, Will, and Holly...mmm hmmm hmmm hmmm hmm hmm (I don't remember all the words) are on a trip somewhere, and then the water gets rough, and then they go down a waterfall and get transported to another world."

Yes, the theme tune is fairly explicit about every single thing that is happening on the screen. Any way. Where was I? I am still SuperTired from the SuperBowl SuperShenanigans. People were still setting off fireworks in my backyard at 2:45am.

Start over. Okay. So, they are in a canoe (or a raft or something), paddling down a quiet river. The weather started getting rough, the tiny ship was tossed, the single dad plus kids are fighting to paddle their way to safety while people off camera throw buckets of water on them to simulate the whitewater. They continue to battle the water when all of a sudden... uh oh! A waterfall!!! AUUUGHHH!!!

The canoe goes over the waterfall to much screaming and chaos. Then the water calms down and based on the surroundings, the family of three can tell that they aren't in Kansas any more.

They've been transported, via canoe (or raft or something), to a different world. The family is on their own with only a few surviving supplies. They have to find food and shelter in this strange world that looks like it was filmed in a church basement while the Sunday Schoolers weren't using it. They make cautious friends with a local Neanderthal-like kid called Chaka, adopt a dinosaur for a pet, learn about edible eats in this land, and encounter the mysterious and evil Sleestak. That's not a guy. Sleestak is plural for Sleestak, which are a strange looking race of bad guys. Or are they? Anyway, you can tell that they are the technology holders (unlike Chaka's people) because they wear robelike clothing that sparkles. And they can disappear and stuff with teleporter like stones that only they can operate.

The plot lines are all "How did we get here" "How can we get home" "Do the Sleestak have the means for us to get home" "Will I die if I eat this thing that looks like a melon?" "I can't believe I'm a single dad on a strange planet (or dimension or something)" "I'll never get a girlfriend if I can't get back to Earth" "Chaka's humble caveman people have a powerful medicine tea" "I wish this alien place had a Costco" etc. etc. Only of course they never Costco. They probably said grocery store or something.

Maybe you would have been better off asking your buddy Tom Jane for a summary :)

Also, I met a real CHiP and he drove me in his car (no, I was not under arrest) AND he gave me a kiss AND a hug (I was at his wedding. It was a gay wedding. Yes. There are gay CHiPs.).

Did I mention that the Steelers won the Super Bowl? And that everyone went crazy until the wee hours of the morning and I got threeish hours of sleep last night?

But I must recommend to you the 12 minute halftime show. Bruce Springsteen is an ass. It was completely hilarious to watch him slide cock-first (I can say cock on this blog, can't I? Or is that too offensive to roosters or something? You gonna delete me, Creedon? I DARE you!!!!) into a stage level camera. OMG!! I LOVE TiVo!!! I totally rewound that one and watched again and again.

Slide, slide, SLAM! (bloop of the rewind sound)
Slide, slide, SLAM! (bloop of the rewind sound)
Slide, slide, SLAM! (bloop of the rewind sound)
Slide, slide, SLAM!

I think that you get the idea.

That j-hole Bruce made fun of my boy Troy. Did I mention that Troy kissed me? Or have I finally bored everyone with that story?

Let me know if you have any further questions.

Constance said...

Oh, and Mark:

Now that they've finished mining your childhood for movies, they've started mining mine.

Also, did you see Springsteen's Disneyland flub?

vaughan said...

Vaughan slowly backs away trying not to make eye contact or show any fear

p.s surely it can't be as crap as HR Puffenstuff!

Constance said...

It was a Sid and Marty Krofft production. Of course it was crap. They were prolific, they were weird, and for some reason, they were hugely popular.

Colonel Creedon said...

Constance: "Land of the Lost?"

I didn't see that trailer. Comedy is always beneath my radar when explosions, lasers, stuntcars and gunfire are on the preceeding trailers. My apologies, the error is corrected.

Constance: "Did you get your 3-D glasses?"

Why? That's not in 3D is it?

Vaughan: "our crap fantasy show experience here was an American series called Mysterious Island"

Don't you mean: Mystery Island? Or have I the wrong thing?

Vaughan: "if it was a CHiPS I can assure you The Colonel wouldn't shut up.....he might even wear the CHIPS outfit he had when he was Five..he boasts how

he still has the gun from it y'know."


No, the gun is long gone - it's the badge I still have and it's right here!!!

Constance: Okay Vaughan. I'll do my best. It's also possible that you and the col are simply too young to remember the series. This show was on about 10 years earlier than your Mysterious Island thingy.

Not to be too pedantic. Land of the Lost was originally 1974 and what I think Vaughan is on about was 1978 [it was just destroyed in 1985] - so you can put

away the zimmerframe dear.

Constance: "Something, Will, and Holly...mmm hmmm hmmm hmmm hmm hmm (I don't remember all the words) are on a trip somewhere, and then the water gets rough, and then they go down a waterfall and get transported to another world."

There's no excuse for not spending some 40 seconds to find the words - and you call yourself a librarian?

Constance: I am still SuperTired from the SuperBowl SuperShenanigans. People were still setting off fireworks in my backyard at 2:45am.

What did I just say about excuses?

Constance: Maybe you would have been better off asking your buddy Tom Jane for a summary :)

I think the less contact sane people have with Tom Jane the better actually.

Bruce Springsteen is an ass.

I concur. Oh, he was one of the main supporters of Barack Obama wasn't he?

I can say cock on this blog, can't I? Or is that too offensive to roosters or something? You gonna delete me, Creedon? I DARE you!!!!

Have you not read any of Cubaboy's posts on this blog?

Vaughan: surely it can't be as crap as HR Puffenstuff!

Ah yes the show that makes sence only when under the influence of drugs...

Constance: They were prolific, they were weird, and for some reason, they were hugely popular.

That reminds me - I must prepare 2IGTV for upload.

vaughan said...

Yoooouuuuu bastard!
Why did you put a link to Mystery Bloody Island on this site...(.oh goooooood I'm having flashbacks ) so bad I love the way though they introduce our heroes bombastic and heroic until they get to to the third character "...and her kid brother sandy."
Awful , awful , awful ...is anyone surprised why the children of ireland in the eighties wrote in and begged RTE to stop showing it!

HR puffenstuff ...Drugs? how did you even come to the conclusion it was influenced by drugs ?( deeply sarcastic, because it was Sid and Marty Kroft no one took any notice , not even the name seemed to give it away)

Land of the Lost ...I read the lyrics ..that's enough for me ( Although reading the third season lyrics I love the way Dad Saved himself but not the kids)

Constance said...

Creedon:
1) I can't believe you missed a trailer that featured Will Ferrell.

2) No, didn't you see the hype for Chuck in 3-D?

3) When I am an old lady I will not use your so called zimmer frame. I will have a respectable ladylike cane which I can use to bash unsuspecting persons with. Also, it could hide a sword.

4) KMA.

5) See above.

6) Is Tom Jane odd? Unlike some people, I am not a personal friend ;)

7) Once again, KMA. See, I'm still too tired for originality :)

8) are you comparing me to Cubaboy?

9)Upload it! Upload it already!

Vaughan:
H.R. Puffenstuff scared me. So did the Banana Splits. I was more of an "Electra Woman and Dyna Girl" watcher. Did you ever see "Beakman's World"?

I don't know how the Dad could save himself and not the kids. Weak way to get rid of the actor. They should have just killed him off.

The Land of the Lost movie will be one of those ones that would be great at the dollar theater - the more audience participation, the better. Oh, and if you're watching the trailer, it may help to know that Matt Lauer is regarded to be pretty sweet and gracious. That's part of the joke, I think.

vaughan said...

The Banana Splits Jesus they were just unfunny and disturbing!

Is Tom Jane Odd ? Bwahwahwhahwhhawhahahwhawhawhwhawhhawhahwhwhwahahwhahwha!

or in a word.....yes!