Monday, May 28, 2007

Bertie Forever or Bertie Begins - Joe(ker) Higgins gone!

I'm no stranger to victory as a quick glance at my fruit salad will tell you; Grenada, Panama, Iraq (I) and Kosovo to name but a few. As the votes were counted in Ireland's general election late into last Friday evening I could get the same smell as that when I stood victorious after the most heated battles of those conflicts. It was not long before it became clear that a victory for Fianna Fail and more importantly our great leader Bertie Ahern was imminent.

It's almost certain now that our government is safe, safe from the control of leftists, socialists and communists who would seek to destroy our nation with their ill conceived plans, false arguments, insane ideas and uncharismatic leaders. While thankfully many of the more extreme left parties lost much of their previous government representation and did not achieve the numbers they had projected for this election, the government itself lost it's main coalition partner, the right-wing Progressive Democrats who were decimated down to 2 seats in government.

The Irish people were robbed of Michael McDowell a patriot whose mission it was to rule with an Iron fist, but FF kept him in check after his unprecedented ascendance to power in 2006. Oh Michael, why did you create a diet-Garda force instead of issuing all the proper Guards Glocks and kevlar and give them AI controlled bikes to dispense justice? - you were practically a Blueshirt! It should have been obvious to you. At least with the departure of a patriot there's also the departure of Socialist nutbag Joe Higgins who throughout the years has done nothing than been the Dail's "class clown" poking fun and been generally disrespectful to Bertie, the elected leader of government. Thankfully he's heading where he should have gone a long time ago down the shitter to obscurity.

All that needs to be done now is to form a stable government with a majority of the 166 seats. In the election, Fianna Fail (the Soldiers Of Destiny) who have provided the lifeblood of Irish politics since the formation of the country have retained all their 78 seats of the previous government. They must now gather forces from the smaller representatives, most likely from the remainder of the Progressive Democrats and like-minded Independents like the fascinating Jackie Healy-Rae (yes, this man is a politician) in order to defeat the evil Enda Kenny and his cronies. A less likely and most undesirable situation is a government formed with the assistance of the tree-hugging hippies The Green Party, this is undesirable as the cost of their allegiance may try to force Bertie to stop the use of Shannon Airport by the US Military to refuel their aircraft in order to pacify the middle east and wage the glorious War on Terror to say nothing of the Green's expensive and ridiculous "measures" we should be employing in order to combat the myth that is "Global Warming".

Let us hope that in the coming weeks, our great leader, Bertie will be successful in seducing Mary Harney and the others into a favourable situation and the country continues on the path where we have prospered for the past decade - AND SO SAY WE ALL!

9 comments:

Alro said...

God, you are so full of shit....

Civilian Overseer said...

I'm glad Bertie got back in, its not half as interesting crucifying a member of the opposition for blatant corruption.

Lt. Colonel Creedon said...

@ Alro. Okay so the bit about MMcD turing the guards into Mega City Judges was a bit far fetched but the rest is from the heart.

@ Civvy. I don't know, Crucifixion sounds pretty intresting...

Civilian Overseer said...

Ahh Maddog McDowall, will we ever see his like again?, lets hope to expletive deleted not!

Crucification's a doddle!

Foehammer said...

Actually I like the idea of Mega City Style justice, at least then the SJS could package Ahern and his cronies off to Titan for 20 :))))) of course you would have to change your title to Chief Judge :))

Civilian Overseer said...

Na, I'd be a Senior Street Judge like Dreed, blasting perps and dispensing instant justice. The Chief Judge doesn't last very long at all.

Some guy wrote into 2000AD around the of the LA riots and wanted to know why the yanks did adopt a MegaCity Style Justice Department, Tharg's response was memorial, Good Idea, but would you move there?

Civilian Overseer said...

Go to wikipedia and search for Bertie Ahern, the picture is priceless.

Civilian Overseer said...

Too late its been changed!

Dahar Master said...

Will we see such a complete and unbiased report this day next week as we did in this post 4 years ago?