Monday, January 01, 2007

2006! The Year In Review

We now say farewell to 2006. A year where we discovered....

that Dutch cartoons could possibly start World War III, Iran and North Korea don't want to play nice with the rest of the world, Dick Cheney shoots his lawyer (accidentally?), Pope Benedict and Mike Richards "come out" as racists, The Brits get medieval on terrorist ass - ban Cherry Coke on airlines, The Zidane headbutt, with no Rings, Harry Pothead or Star Wars- Pirates storms the box office, John Kerry insinuates that all US Servicemen are retarded imbiciles, Russia still in the assassination game, Democrats take control and Rumsfeld resigns.

We lost: James Brown, Mickey Spillane, Joe Rosenthal, Basil Poledouris, Peter Boyle, Charlie Haughey, Steve Irwin, Shirley Walker, Aaron Spelling, Jack Palance, Jack Warden, Gerald Ford, Chris Penn and in the Global War On Terror- 246 good Marines.

But what about all the good things in 2006: Top of the Pops finally ends, Slobodan Milošević is found dead in his cell, the world is given the Wii, Saddam Hussein is executed, common users generate more internet content than ever before, a new Bond, Abu Musab al-Zarqawi is righteously killed, we get Heroes, Robert Altman dies and best of all: France doesn't win the World Cup.

Now: prepare for the 1st major event of 2007: the 2nd Annual Whopper Awards!

8 comments:

vaughan said...

On the promise of the "Awards!" I felt a shiver run down my spine as if someone had walked over my grave.

Lt. Colonel Creedon said...

Not to worry, there will be much more of them this year :)

Civilian Overseer said...

Lt.Col, speaking of dubious awards, why don't you tell us that fascinating tale of how you got that purple heart. It took the Doctors all of 5 seconds to remove the splinter as I recall.

Lt. Colonel Creedon said...

You "recall" Jack Shit, clown! I spilt serious blood for each of my Purple Hearts- took mortar shrapnel in Beruit in '84, landmine blast in Iraq '91, took a few rounds in Somalia as well in '93. (the 4th award is classified at present).

Civilian Overseer said...

I spilt serious blood for each of my Purple Hearts - that you split blood is not in doubt, what is in question is exactly whos blood did you spill?.

It is amazing how, surviors of landmine incidents, usually have a limb or couple of limbs missing, say in around 100% of cases. You however, have all your appendages intact, no wait, I retract that last statement and instead say, You however, seem, to have all your appendages intact, (this may explain the whizzanator incident) So Lt.Col, I demand proof of your injuries, show us these suppossed scars.

Lt. Colonel Creedon said...

I was damn lucky. The Iraq landmine did cause the most damage but being the best at what I did (and having a few "friends" in high places) warranted that I had a custom underbelly-armoured Humvee which I was in at the time. Foolishly I left my arm hang out the side and this happened. The other scars have healed (including the ones that are pretty difficult to photograph properly without someone's help- do you volunteer?

Civilian Overseer said...

Those scratches?, Sir, you cheapen the honour of all those who have suffered permenant disabilitaties in our nation's armed forces by comparing those fleabites to real injuries.

If that is your definition of spilling blood, I should have been awarded 20 purple hearts before I left kindergarden. That first image, looks like it was caused by an shirt ironing mishap. Spilt Blood?, Split Urine at the sight of the enemy more like, me thinks.

I demand satisfaction and not the kind from a cheap bottle of scotch and a blonde fluzzy that you are so familiar with. You have the choice of weapons, though I'd advise you to avoid the use of Wit, as you are only half prepared.

Lt. Colonel Creedon said...

How dare one such as you defame me in such a manner. I've never been more insulted by anything you've said here more than this.
Everyone knows I only get satisfaction from Whiskey and Redheads not Scotch and Blondes.