Monday, August 25, 2008

2008 Democratic National Convention Schedule of Events

I've been accused of slightly favouring the Republican candidates in the current war for the White House. I find this preposterous. I've always been totally impartial on this blog. In an effort to reconcile differences I will take the time to publish this, the 2008 Democratic National Convention Schedule of Events which has just been released and sent to me by Bruce Russell who sent this to me only days after becoming a daddy!

7:00 pm Opening Flag Burning
7:15 pm Pledge Of Allegiance to the U.N.
7:20 pm Ted Kennedy proposes a toast
7:25 pm Nonreligious Prayer and Worship - Jesse Jackson & Al Sharpton
7:45 pm Ceremonial Tree Hugging - Darryl Hannah
7:55 pm Ted Kennedy proposes a toast
8:00 pm How I invented the Internet - Al Gore
8:15 pm Gay wedding planning - Rosie O'Donnell
8:35 pm Ted Kennedy proposes a toast
8:40 pm Our Troops are War Criminals - John Kerry
9.00 pm Memorial Service for Saddam and sons - Cindy Sheehan and Susan Sarandon
10:00 pm Answering Machine Etiquette - Alec Baldwin
11:00 pm Ted Kennedy proposes a toast
11:05 pm Collection for the Osama Bin Laden Kidney Transplant Fund – Barbara Streisand
11:15 pm Free the Freedom Fighters from Guantanamo Bay - Sean Penn
11:30 pm Oval Office Affairs - William Jefferson Clinton
11:45 pm Ted Kennedy proposes a toast
11:50 pm How George Bush brought down the World Trade Towers - Howard Dean
12:15 am Truth in Broadcasting Award - Presented to Dan Rather by Michael Moore
12:25 am Ted Kennedy proposes a toast
12:30 am Satellite Address - Mahmoud Ahmadinejad
12:45 am Nomination of Barack Hussein Obama - Nancy Pelosi
1:00 am Ted Kennedy proposes a toast
1:05 am Coronation Of Barack Hussein Obama
1:30 am Ted Kennedy proposes a toast
1:35 am Bill Clinton asks Ted Kennedy to drive Hilary home.

5 comments:

Civilian Overseer said...

Now, now, at the Republicans's convention We all get to play find the WMD. ;)

Former Grunt said...

I find the lack of coverage of the "assassination plot" against Obama... ...suspicious.

Lt. Colonel Creedon said...

@ Grunt: Who would think Billary would stoop so low. I know she's a sore looser but this effort is madness. I hope someone puts a stop to her.

constance said...

1) I heard (after the fine job this blog did of alerting me to the fact that there even was an "assassination plot") that they didn't even charge the would-be assassins! Something about them being totally lame? Their threats the racist rantings of drug (meth!) abusers? And did you hear what the one guy's name is? Shawn Adolph. So. They are racist idiots and one of them is named Adolph.

2) Denver is the whitest city I have ever been in. Obama might have been the only black man they could find to threaten. And the only one with, you know, round the clock Secret Service protection?

3) Jon Stewart is calling his coverage of the convention "Guess who's coming to Denver?"

Lt. Colonel Creedon said...

Hypothetically, it could be conceived that the plan was: should they have been discovered, they were to act as racist inbred yokels and have been on meth for several days before the attempt so they would appear harmless to lull Obama's team into a false sense of security?

Hypothetically of course...