Wednesday, April 02, 2008

A Dark Day for Ireland

It is with a tear filled eye that I regretfully announce that our great leader Bertie Ahern will be stepping down as Taoiseach, Prime Minister of Ireland.

Bertie, almost a living saint, has had to duck and dodge a barrage of personal attacks on him and his finances over many months. And like a true hero he had decided to fall on his sword, to protect his party, the government and our nation from the treasonous actions of the opposition.

In a general election last year, the people of Ireland spoke up in a solid voice that they didn't mind who gave him money or what the hell he does with it as long as he would continue to lead our nation as he had done in the previous decade.

However, ignoring the voice of the people they claim to represent, the traitors in opposition government continued to put a negative spin on the origins of some small amounts (to politicians) of cash that poor Bertie had away for a rainy day. This constant aggressive assault on a national hero, the greatest leader since C.J. Haughey eroded his famous "Teflon" coating and destroyed his political will.

But Bertie will have the last laugh, as someone said to me, "he'll rise from the ashes in some alternate form" (maybe even President Bertie?) but one thing is for sure: His place in history is secure as a bringer of peace to Northern Ireland and much more, whereas Enda Kenny and Eamonn Gillmore's most valuable contributions to history will only be their photographs beside the Oxford Dictionary terms "Smarmy Little Fucker" and "Semi-retarded Gobshite" respectively.

4 comments:

Alro said...

Nice picture. I prefer this one though... http://img91.imageshack.us/my.php?image=image004gu4.jpg

Civilian Overseer said...

Just like Jesus!. ;)

Payback Force said...

Who is going to pay for his make-up now?? I heard his going to be the new model for Oil of Olay!!!!

Lt. Colonel Creedon said...

You forget his pension is €162,000 per annum. Enough for his own personal Avon lady :)