Monday, July 30, 2012

UNPASID COS surrenders!


The Chief of Staff, currently temporary acting director of UNPASID, Rear Admiral "Piscine" Aguillard [left] failed to assume his duties at UNHQ this morning.

It's understood that Admiral Aguillard had his staff car re-route to the french consulate on 5th Avenue rather than proceed to the UNHQ for "diplomatic reasons".

The admiral's aide proceeded to the UNHQ 90 minutes later to inform the UNSC that the admiral had surrendered himself to authorities, admitting corruption and potentially treasonous activity.

Senior Colonel “Matsu” Lee, the UNPASID Director of Logistics and Assistant Chief of Staff did not answer a call to report as temporary director of UNPASID after Aguillard's surrender. Colonel Lee was apparently “recalled urgently” to China this morning due to what was described by the Chinese Ambassador to the UN as “a family matter”. He asked that the UN should not ask when the colonel will return to work and should appoint a replacement for him “to most likely be a permanent replacement.”

Brigade General "Boogyman" Rojas, UNPASID Director of Operations who was on site at UNHQ is understood to have been now been given temporary command of the directorate with the consent of the United States who has the power of veto over all non-P5 temporary appointments.

In other news, the crew and passenger of Gryphon 12, the UNPASID transport carrying Brigadier "Walrus" Jones to UNHQ, who were rescued off the Canadian coast yesterday have been interviewed at St. John's Coast Guard Base, Newfoundland. Investigators however have still not been able to ascertain any cause for the loss of the aircraft or Brigadier Jones

Neither the rescued passenger Captain "Watchtower" Park, senior pilot Flight Lieutenant "Jinks" Herrick nor his crew felt, heard or saw anything between normal operations on board Gryphon 12 at 00:10NDT Saturday morning and suddenly waking up in their life jackets in the Labrador Sea 29 hours later.

1 comment:

Former Grunt said...

Who would've thought that a French Admiral would've surrendered.

Although he does seem to have been the only one with the wherewithall to say "Sacre Bleu!" and scarper!